01. TEXT

[quickquotes]

( It has taken Rita most of the time she's spent in Lunatia thus far to understand enough of this 'technology' to send out a broadcast. She's not the type to let such a little hurdle as unfamiliarity get in the way of reporting the news, and she is glad to announce her success with her very first article! )

UNDEAD YET DEADLY
The inhabitants of Lunatia might seem an uncouth lot, with their scales and their horns and other extraneous appendages. However, the natives of this world appear positively genteel when compared to who, or should I say, what walks amongst us, attempting to blend quietly into the shadows. Fortunately, I, Rita Skeeter, freelance journalist-for-hire, am here to shed light on the situation.

The Moonblessed by the name of ‘Ambrosine’, is a self-confessed practitioner of the Dark Arts. She is also known to post on this network under the alias of ‘undyingsoul’, which should tell you everything you need to know already. If you still require an explanation, know this: every magical child from the youngest of ages is taught that death is permanent. Any individual who attempts to meddle with mortality is faced with a fate worse than death: the eternal corruption of the soul.

Why does this matter, you might ask?


Those of you from my own world might know of the evilest Dark Wizard of our time, a man so evil that even after his defeat we still refuse to speak his name, only referring to him as He Who Must Not Be Named. In the name of ideological superiority and in search for the secrets of immortality, this Dark Wizard murdered thousands of people, witches, wizards and Muggles alike.

To use a more local frame of reference: as many of you will know, the city is still recovering from the aftermath of the rampages of another Dark Wizard, Asmodeus, who used his powers to control the minds of many innocent bystanders. Could Lunatia withstand another attack so soon?

While Ambrosine has not shown any untoward predilections to violence yet in her time here, evidence suggests she has so far murdered one innocent person in her quest for immortality thus far, as well as a unicorn (a most sacred magical animal).

How many more deaths will she cause? Can this type of individual truly be allowed to walk around our society unchecked? My recommendation would be to lock her up and throw away the key before she can cause any more harm to befall others.

After all, there’s enough to get used to in this new society without wondering about murderers in our midst. As so succinctly put by local resident, the charming thirty-six-year-old Mr. Valmont: it’s positively exhausting!

( After the main text in the article, smaller lettering reads: if you have leads which require any further investigation, or any information you would like me to know, please contact me here.

The name, again, is Rita Skeeter. )

Comments

[quickquotes]

( There's a moment where Rita just stares. She doesn't enjoy being mocked (truly, who does?), but that doesn't mean she's not used to people not appreciating her work. So although her lips purse in dissatisfaction, she pulls her self back together and responds: )

Not at all. You must have misunderstood me.

( It's a generous interpretation of the situation. )

1/2

[loungelizard]

Oh, not at all! We are definitely on the same page. Now--I don't want to belabor the same point at least a dozen other people have, but libel and incitement are illegal, so you have just as much moral backbone as the rest of us.

Anyway, that's not the point I wanted to make. You're a woman passionate about her journalism. I can see that. I can only imagine how awful it must feel to watch your hard work get dismissed so universally! So, really, I want to make you an offer: why don't you write an article about a man who has died countless times and yet comes back every time? A man who managed to get an entire country's secret ops to hunt him down? A man who has a rap sheet just as long as his resumé?

Someone like...

2/2

[loungelizard]

Me!

[quickquotes]

( What. Just what. )

You've... truly returned from the dead? Several times?

[loungelizard]

More times than it's humanly possible to count, but I remember them all vividly!

[The latter part is a slight lie but does it really matter.]

[quickquotes]

( She leans forward, propping her chin on her hand. )

And you'll be willing to recount these experiences for me? In detail?

[loungelizard]

I would love to! ...For the right price, of course. Hehe!

[quickquotes]

( Her expression sours. )

Why should I pay you?

[loungelizard]

[He giggles, then waves it off.]

Not so literally, babe! In fact, if I'd have my way about it, we'd both be rewarded with...ample monetary, eh, recompense...

[If you get his drift.]

[quickquotes]

( Ah. Interest re-ignited, she leans in towards the feed. )

You're talking about moonlacing.

[loungelizard]

[He clicks his tongue twice and fingerguns at the camera.]

You get the juicy scoop and we both get paid for our time. Whaddya say, sweetheart?

[quickquotes]

I'm listening.

( A pause. )

Should we meet in person to discuss this matter further?

[loungelizard]

Oh, I would love to! Give me a time and place, and I'll be there! [He giggles.]

[quickquotes]

( She sends him the name and address of a cozy cafe on level 2. )

2pm, tomorrow?

-> Action???

[loungelizard]

Perfect! I'll be outside. Don't keep me waiting, babe! ♪

[But he will be anyway, because he shows up early, leaning against the wall near the door to the cafe and looking casual but alert in hopes to see Rita coming.]

action!! if you're still interested in continuing this crusty old thread that is... :,)

[quickquotes]

( Rita Skeeter is nothing if not punctual, especially when there's a potentially juicy scoop on the line. She's standing by the door in her resplendent green robes, crocodile-skin handbag clutched under one arm, with the tip of a large quill poking out of the corner. Recognising the man waiting for her, she approaches him briskly before reaching out a hand to shake. )

Rita Skeeter. I never got your name -- how very remiss of me!