(Video; UN: motherofdragons)

[decisiveconquest]

(Sanguis has blessed her and no one can tell her differently. Daenerys is standing before a mirror, running her fingertips over the horns protruding from her head. However those additions do not thrill her as much as the leathery wings on her back.

If her smile makes you feel a bit uncomfortable, that is understandable. The scales on her cheeks and the fact that her blue eyes are anything but human don't help matters, however there is an undefinable quality about her. Perhaps this isn't a blessing after all.)

Am I a monster? (Her hands shake as she presses her talons against her cheeks.) Is this...me? Have I always been this?

Comments

[kayssistant]

No, Daenerys! You're not a monster.

[Kay shakes her head vigorously. She has to admit, Daenerys looks so cool, and didn't she want wings? The wings were there, but...what was wrong about her Sanguis transformation?]

You said you freed a city and took care of people. That's not what a monster does!

[decisiveconquest]

I -

(She has told some about her greatest sin; her greatest mistake, but not all. Will Kay turn away in disgust?

Of course she will. Anyone would.)

I did that before, in Essos. When I landed in Westeros, I sought the Iron Throne. In my fight to acquire it, I razed a city to the ground. I killed...thousands.

[kayssistant]

[Her brow furrows. That didn't sound like something Daenerys would do, especially if she cared so much about innocents and former slaves.

But Kay holds her tongue - and her judgment. While she has done her part to catch murderers back home, other worlds weren't as peaceful as hers. Surely there was a good reason for Daenerys' actions.]

Why? Was the Iron Throne really that important?

[decisiveconquest]

I thought it was. (Her voice is hoarse, broken.) I lost two sons, countless friends and allies all in the pursuit of it. I couldn't find it in me to be merciful. I was so...angry.

I felt like I was alone.

[kayssistant]

You felt angry and alone...I think all of us know how that feels.

[She can sympathize when it comes to losing people, at the very least. At one point she had been so consumed by a need for revenge that she ran headlong into danger - right into the waiting arms of the woman who had killed her father and who had no qualms about using her as a hostage.]

I'm sorry you lost your loved ones, too.

[It sounds like this Iron Throne isn't all it's cracked up to be.]

[decisiveconquest]

A queen should rise above those feelings. Instead I became a slave to them; I can never allow myself to repeat those actions.

(Or let herself feel that desperate; that lost. A Targaryen all alone in the world is a terrible thing. Daenerys swallows the ache in her throat, glancing down.)

I can't stop thinking about them.

[kayssistant]

Then, since you said you never want that to happen again...I still think you're not a monster.

[She shakes her head again; more slowly this time.]

[decisiveconquest]

...thank you. (Maybe she is just...damaged. Hopefully not beyond repair.) I don't like to think of myself like that.

[kayssistant]

You don't have to. [Kay spreads her arms.] And a lot of people probably think the same way - that you're not a monster.

[decisiveconquest]

I don't want to forget those who died or my part in it. I have to hold onto that much and even if I can't forgive myself, I have to move forward.

(No matter how much is hurts to take each step.)

[kayssistant]

You can remember them without thinking you're a monster. You could say...those people helped you realize your mistake.