text (sn: seiros)

[immaculate_one]

This is a question I have yet to see asked on this network, though I only have the slightest hypothesis of why.

How have you viewed religion or faith from your home? Has it changed drastically before coming here, or since?

I have been thinking about this lately...

Comments

text | un: benefic

[aheroipray]

its
hard
to say the least
religion or faith, even and
i couldn't call myself terribly religious but i still believed
now i question that belief... i suppose it's naive?

its complicated
my relationship with religion changed rather drastically shortly before coming here and im still uncertain so being here hasn't helped

have you had problems?

[immaculate_one]

I have no interest in convincing people of worshiping gods who don't help them.

But after being here that also means I am in no state to guide others, and probably shouldn't. Not without knowing what path I should tread first.

[aheroipray]

?
dont gods usually not help those they preside over?

i think its a bit vague but i've no problem not being helped
my problem is that i think one of the gods ive followed may have led a lie
why would you think that you can't guide others
i think there is still worth in wisdom
even if you haven't done it
are you a priest?

[immaculate_one]

Someone else mentioned to me that there are gods who deceived their followers. It's certainly possible, but it is a strange concept to me.

Guiding others is what I have done for many years, but the history of my lands meant that I deceived people for the greater good... or what I thought was the greater good. It turned out not to be the case.

[aheroipray]

haha
ah im sorry
not laughing at you
being in a similar situation, there's a kind of relief?

but it is also sad.
learning what you believed in for so long, especially when you go to such lengths and it betrays you in the end...
it's really cold.
but i suppose there's nothing to be done but keep moving forward

[immaculate_one]

You are correct in that there is no choice but to move forward.

You could say that I've run into a fork in the road. If I was no good at guiding others, where do I find my way?

[aheroipray]

you said you deceived people for the greater good
a greater good that turned out not to be good at all?
but because of that you think you're no good at guiding others

but that isnt your fault
did you find pride in guiding others?
before you realized you were wrong
did you think you were doing alright?

[immaculate_one]

Objectively, I managed to maintain a rather stable period of peace.

Mentally, I always felt like I was succeeding by a hair.

[ It was why she wanted to revive Sothis. ]

I clung too tightly. I would sink back into bad habits if I tried to lead again. But the tenets of what I taught... I still believe them. I'll never give them up.

[aheroipray]

it sounds to me like you know what you did wrong
and still believe in what you do
so the only step is finding out how to fix what you did wrong so you dont do it again

one mistake shouldnt mean the end of something you're passionate about

[immaculate_one]

The situation at home is probably not as simple as I am making it sound.

[ For one thing, the revolutionary that caused everything to blow up died back home, but here she's still looming like a child specter. ]

But still, thank you for your words.