Video; UN: moxuanyu

[noenvy]

[The user can't be seen just yet but he can be heard. The camera is pointed at a large soaking tub in a modern bathroom and the speaker seems overly excited about it all.]

Look at this! It's quite amazing, isn't it? The water is right there, just with a twist.

[A hand reaches out to turn a nob and water rushes out.]

Both hot and cold! It's genius!

Do you think this is easy to break? It looks quite sturdy.

Oh! This is exciting! What great things this place has! I want to try it out!

Comments

[noenvy]

Thank you Lan Zhan.

[He can’t help but smile a little, and it was genuine.]

[inheritedpain]

[ His face heated up, turning ruddy at the same moment that his knuckles turned white as he gripped his father’s sword too tightly, the point wavering a little as the intensity of his feelings made the end quiver.

He had not calmed down since coming here.

If anything, the unanswered questions had festered in his chest - the youthful nature of all his relatives stifling any attempt to move on rather than just bury all his feelings.

He dragged in a ragged breath, and then forced a sneer to his lips he didn’t quite feel. ]

So what if it doesn’t make me feel better! It isn’t about me!

You killed my parents and then you lied to me from the moment you met me!

[ Moisture started gathering in his eyes despite himself and his face twisted, taking a deliberate step forward with his sword, tip aimed at the final target Wei Wuxian has given him. ]

Why!! Why did you do it!! I don’t understand!!

[noenvy]

I was broken and I lost control....

[If that was true for the Jin Lings world he didn’t know, but it was true for his.]

There were reasons to hide who I was, involving the investigation. It’s not as if you can say “Hi I’m the Yiling Patriarch back from the dead!”

[He didn’t move or flinch or even look nervous. He stood still and kept his eyes on Jin Ling.]

[inheritedpain]

That’s not good enough!

[ He snapped it, voice breaking a little on the final word. He refused it. ]

Stop lying to me! You weren’t— you hadn’t done anything to anyone for a year and then you just murdered him! On your way— on your way to—

[ He couldn’t get it out, his vision blurring, frustration and heart break making it so much harder. ]

He never did anything to you and you killed him!

[noenvy]

It was a set up, he... shouldn’t have been there. I won’t deny that I have never liked him, and it clouded my judgement. But, I did not go with the intent of hurting anyone.

[He had not been able to realize just how unstable he had been. How much demonic energy had made him paranoid and quick to anger, along with his arrogance and assuming everything would be fine just because he willed it so.

It was one of the worst days of his life.]

That was now a lifetime ago....

[inheritedpain]

My lifetime! [ He hissed viciously, anger bubbling up so hot and furious inside of him that he didn’t even know what to do with it. ]

It was my life time ago! How does that make what you’ve done worth any less!

[ His voice was raising, not giving a damn that they were in a public space. ]

Go on and tell me how the passage of time has made it any better that you robbed me of my parents! That you stole my family from me!! Tell me!

[noenvy]

I already died.

[So his literally past life.]

And I would take it all back if I could, but I can’t. I can’t ever change that day, I can’t ever have Jiang Yanli back, I will never have Jiang Cheng’s trust. She was my family too... she was my Shijie, and I never wanted to hurt her, or take her husband away.

But there is nothing we can do. We can live here and appreciate the miracle we are given.

Time just makes the pain get bearable.

[inheritedpain]

Not for me!

[ Something broke in his chest, a month’s worth of pent up anger cracking against a life time of grief. He blinked back furious tears, the rip of his sword wavering helplessly.

He thought it would make more sense, if he knew.

He thought Wei Wuxian would somehow reveal it was all a misunderstanding, that somehow he wasn’t really responsible. That somehow Jin Ling could focus all that hate on someone else.

But he couldn’t. It was still Wei Wuxian’s fault, after all. And with no good reason.

He sucked in a breath through gritted teeth, unable to keep the tears at bay any longer, rolling down his cheeks, the sight far from the elegent and perfect tears of Hanguang-Jun. ]

It doesn’t get more bearable for me—-

text → video

[downswing]

( Of all the people in all the world who never earned a favour from Wangji, here is Wei Wuxian, paid another — he switches to video, because Wei Ying asked, and it's the same familiar gloom and doom set to wash the video world. )


Nothing to thank me.

[wangji]

Alright.

[noenvy]

You finally let me see you!

[And his smile got a little brighter.]

Perhaps, but I still appreciate it.

[noenvy]

[He closed the distance between them, avoiding Suihua and wrapped Jin Ling in a hug. If he fought he would just hold him tighter, because this is what he needed. This child who felt too much and was too proud, raised by the worst and had all the most complicated traits. Proper affection was important and he had been robbed of it.]

I know. I know....

[noenvy]

Lan Zhan! You’re so good to me!

I’m going to go get things for it!

[downswing]

Little to see.

[ Other than Wangji's troubled and deeply complicated relationship with holding his device so the camera hits at a semi-respectable angle. ]

Whichever the world, we are friends.

[noenvy]

There's a lot to see! I couldn't even hear your voice. Even if you don't say much, isn't that unfair? You have a good voice and you have a good face, you shouldn't hide it.

[And it was a little funny to see him struggle, it would always be fun to see him struggle!]

Of course! No matter what world and who, Wei Wuxian and Lan Wangji will always be good friends!

[But was that what Lan Wangji wanted? He so very much wanted to meddle and his tone of voice was nothing but playful. Dangerous.]

[zhaoyunlanmadeajournal]

You can't gauge a person's character just by their pretty face. Sometimes, a pretty face is the most dangerous. [ Look at Shen Wei. ]

A problem with breaking baths?

[noenvy]

You can't even see my face! But, it is indeed pretty.

[He didn't think of himself as particularly dangerous though.]

He is strong and gets excited and the next thing you know there's water everywhere.

[zhaoyunlanmadeajournal]

I know, I'm just saying, it's hard to tell at face value. A voice or face or even a handshake can only tell you a little. You could be the type that can break a board just by looking at it, for all I know.

Sounds like he needs a tub made of metal or something.

[downswing]

( Can it be? A smile? Surely not. )

Take care.

[noenvy]

[The smallest of smiles, but he will love them none the less.]

I will! And you do as well.

Don't be a stranger.

[noenvy]

That's true, though, there is a lot you can learn of a person at a very first meeting. People always have their tells.

[You had to be really observant though, and probably know something more about them.]

A metal tub? I never thought of that.

[zhaoyunlanmadeajournal]

Most do, some are deceptive right from the beginning, ah? But maybe I'm just suspicious off the cuff no matter the situation. Maybe it's called... ahh... occupational illness?

Mm, I couldn't tell ya where to find one, but they exist. Not very comfortable, but better than a flood, right?

[noenvy]

Such a dilemma, comfortable but potentially breakable, uncomfortable and sturdy.

[He can't help but sigh a little, however, there was an interesting topic at hand and he switched gears pretty quickly.]

And what is this occupation that has you so stuck in your ways?

[inheritedpain]

[ The sword, still held aloft between them, offered no more barrier to approach than a blade of grass. He didn’t drop it - would never willingly do so - but the point lowered as he found arms wrapping around him. He didn’t fight it. He should have fought it, but he didn’t.

Instead he sobbed helplessly, his arm lowering the rest of the way as he pressed his face into the man’s chest, burying himself against him. His shoulders shook as he cried, furious and grief stricken all at once.

He couldn’t do it.

He couldn’t avenge his parents. Even though his entire life had been built around preparing him for it, even though it had been hammered into his head again and again what they would do if they ever found Wei Wuxian, he couldn’t do it.

He was a disgrace, a disappointment to his family. His inability casting a greater dishonour on them than he could even name, and he wept with every ounce of that failure crushing down on him.

He knew what he had to do and he couldn’t do it. What was he even any good for? ]

[noenvy]

[He didn't know the depths of Jin Ling's feelings but he was familiar with the general idea of what they might be. He didn't let go and he didn't say anything, allowing him to cry it out. It was all he could do at this moment. He had nothing he could say, there were no words to make it better. Things were as they were, the past was the past. Revenge would help no one.

But, perhaps crying for a while, expressing his feelings and having someone there would help.]