💍 video

[badluckblues]

Hey there, fellow Lunatians.

[ Though the video shows an older man with silver in his hair and gravel in his voice, he is apparently tech savvy enough to operate the camera without any shaking of the frame or a blurring of the focus. Good for him!

He is slouched forward on his couch, which seems necessary to get the totality of his very long body in the shot, and his stubbled face is an unreadable mask of casual neutrality. ]

I'm posting here tonight because I've got a message for someone who's grown very special to me since we arrived here on Prismatica. This beautiful woman right here -

[ He pulls out another device, which looks something like a translucent-screened iPhone, and uses it to show off a photo to the recording camera. ]

You may know her as Winter Schnee, the Ice Queen, or maybe just that potential alien pod person who recently uploaded a 20 minute formal presentation on terms and negotiations for casual, no-strings-attached frotting for Chroma. If you're relatively new to the planet and missed out on that, well that's a shame because it was really something. If you're lucky, maybe you'll be able to dig it up in the archives.

Anyway, my message is this. More of a question, really.

[ With an enigmatic smile, Qrow stands from the couch, only to stoop to a crouch on one knee as he produces from his pocket a small, wooden box which soon takes up most of the frame. The box opens to reveal two gorgeously polished Eternal Rings of Promise, identically crafted gleaming bands of steel inlaid with a decidedly otherworldy blue wood. ]

Winter Schnee, would you do me the honor...



...of giving these damn power buffing rings to your sister already, so you can stop giving me heart attacks by soliciting completely random weirdos over the network for sex?

[ End video. ]

Comments

[Action]

[specialist_snowflake]

[What's disturbing is probably the fact that there's no response to the video message. That's because Winter has no desire to waste any time in expressing her immense fury and disgust. He probably thinks he's being funny. She feels humiliated, and angry, and a tiny tiny tiny bit disappointed and what's worse...he broadcast the reason she wanted to get the rings in the first place, exposing Weiss's vulnerability to the general public.]

[So she's a little bit pissed to the point where she used her glyphs to shoot across down in mere minutes, and the little white Nevermore that suddenly shatters his window from a downward angle probably makes that quite clear. Winter is outside, teeth grit, rapier drawn, as she stands in the center of a glowing summoning glyph.]

Qrow.

[Someone's in trouble.]

[badluckblues]

[ Of course Qrow doesn't think he's being funny. Qrow thinks he's being hilarious. Neither is he too terribly concerned with the lack of her response, up until the point his window shatters into a million pieces and just about sends him jumping out of his skin with the suddenness of it.

Once he peeks out of his kitchen to see Winter with her teeth bared and her sword drawn, no further explanation is necessary.

He looks down at the broken glass, and then back to her. And sighs. What a mess. ]

You come to collect, or what?

Voice

[ensuredsurvival]

Why did I bother trying to get you killed when you get killed on your own...

Should have asked for something better.

Voice

[badluckblues]

You sure should have, since asking for me dead got you jack squat nothing.

audio;

[madannoshashu]

[ Thank you, Qrow, for this prime entertainment. He turns on the audio for once so the other man can hear him clapping. ]

Oooohhh, a lover's spat on the network, very nice.

You gonna survive or should I get a tombstone ready for you?

audio;

[badluckblues]

[ over the sound of shattering glass??: ]

...hm, going with tombstone on this one.

[Video]

[sheisthewind]

[Well, she can tell this is going to end in a fight, and she is all for it.]

Well now. Do try not to die.

[Video]

[badluckblues]

[ alive! but there's a broken window in the background. ]

Pleased to report I ain't dead yet.

[audio]

[good_bamf_ugly]

[There's a low whistle] I know a dead man walking when I see one.

[audio]

[badluckblues]

Yeah, that seems to be what everyone is telling me.

Video

[foolishjustice]

[A moment of staring with iridescent cuttlefish eyes, and then...]

Try not to die too messily, someone has to clean that up.

Video

[badluckblues]

Don't worry, we got swiffy bots for that.

audio;

[bailian]

For a while it sounded like you were proposing to this person.

[ Yes, it's the Captian Obvious answer. But Binghe just doesn't understand. Why would someone put on an act like that only for it to be a bluff? ]

audio;

[badluckblues]

[ because someone is a dick. 🙃 alas, Qrow similarly skips completely skips past the point: ]

Thank you for being the only person to comment who isn't just here to watch me die.

video | un: stormflower

[sleepinglotus]

[Ohhhhhh dear.

Oh dear.

This is.

This is something else.

Ren is trying to hide his amusement and failing horribly.]

What color of flowers should we have for your funeral?

video

[badluckblues]

[ Thank you, Ren. He sees that smirk you're trying to hide. ]

I've always been partial to red and black. Surprising to no one, I know.

[Video] | UN: Fireballin19

[nailed_it]

[Oh my god.

Oh my god.]

I can't believe I'm saying this, but I think you're better off going back to ogling random innkeepers.

[video]

[badluckblues]

What do you mean [ airquotes ] 'going back.'

Video

[burnwithawesome]

Someone buy this man a drank. You really had me going there.

Video

[badluckblues]

Yes, someone. Anyone, please.

un: strawberryshortcake

[lifehacker]

this is the only good post
lemme smoke you out
ill blow you too

[badluckblues]

the only good reply to be honest

gonna need both of those things after all this

[better_goodbyes]

[Tai almost choked when he heard the first part of the message, for a second he had thought that Qrow was really. . . when it finished he couldn't help but laugh.]

She's going to kill you. But it was a pretty effective way to get her to listen.

[badluckblues]

If by 'listen' you mean 'bust my window out with Nevermore summons,' yep. It was.

un: Slevin

[kratistos]

I'm so conflicted on whether to applaud you or fear for your life. But have some virtual golf claps.

[badluckblues]

look i had a good run, and if i'm gonna go out then it should be with a bang

text | un: standingyew

[eyesofazure]

As someone who has been on the giving end of a messy proposal in the past, I hope you realize this will forever taint any true proposal you decide to make in the future.

[badluckblues]

huh. guess it's a good thing i don't plan on making one, yeah?

video;

[unhappy]

Aren't you just bragging about how much sex you had to get those?

[ Since... If he's presenting them, he is the one who had all the chroma to buy them.......... ]

video

[badluckblues]

I'm surprised that's where you went with this. Kids these days.

[ not even a denial... ]