prismatica | un: stickysticky ( video )

Entry tags:

un: stickysticky ( video )

Hey fellow Moonblessies. [ Yuzuriha doesn't hide the fact that she's in a sour mood this evening, trying to smile and then swiftly giving that up. ] I absolutely hate not being able to get any good sleep. These days I keep having the same few dreams and at first it was all fine and dandy, I could just act like it never happened, but lately they're really trying to dig at me...

[ There's a moment where she looks away from the screen, a little miffed, and then it becomes evident that she's struck with something -- anyone familiar may know this as Yuzuriha's "brain blast". ]

Someone must've put a curse on me! I mean, it'd make sense after because I -- [ Have already made enemies? That's just one dude and she doesn't pay attention to the rest. ] just attract those kinds of people. It's so hard to live when you're just the ideal girl... [ Queue a dramatic sigh, the back of her hand being placed against her forehead as she leans against her couch. ]

All jokes aside I'm bored and would reaaaaaaaaaally love some company right now. Especially since I doubt I'll be sleeping anytime soon, so! [ She clasps her hands together, now focusing in on the camera with a wide grin. ] What kind of dreams wake y'all up in a fuss?

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

How you say yet really concerns me... [ Well obviously he's trained. And the fact of the matter is she's seen that creatures like that exist, so it wouldn't be entirely surprising. ] But if you're so confident then that means I can sit on the sidelines and cheer from there. Go, go, Ri~ou~!

[ And maybe jump in if it gets too dangerous... Because let's be real honest, a known criminal who is supposed to be stronger than the average human and then some versus a giant mantis? We know who's the winner here. ]

Oh! That makes sense! [ A slight pause. ] So do you get nightmares regularly?

I haven't met one yet, but if it's edible I wouldn't mind trying it.

[ He likes to try all the ingredients. He'll fight a giant mantis for that. He's a normal human even if he's well-trained and has a weird weapon, though, so he'd mostly just be impressed if he got saved by Yuzuriha. He likes it when people have his back. ]

Anyone who's seen battle has nightmares sometimes.

You think so?

[ She cants her head to one side. ]

I mean... I guess. But in my opinion I think you've gotta have a lot of heart to still get 'em, so that means Riou is a really nice guy~ [ Whereas she's lying about dream of an island that, while frightening, she's put behind her for the time being. Fabricating a scenario like this is much more comforting than admitting that the face of her sister continues to stir her awake; an unsettling feeling of disappointment that makes her sick to her stomach. ] And I'm only sayin' this cause I've had to deal with a lot of criminals in my day. Those guys could go into any battle and sleep for days, completely undisturbed, like nothing happened.

[ Never mind the fact that she's talking about herself. ]

Hey, do you think it's unfair that those people sleep soundly?

No.

[ Riou thinks on it for a moment. He doesn't hold it against anyone if they don't have nightmares. He's sure there are people he's known who haven't, but he likes to think that they all have. Just because people claim they don't or don't act like they're haunted doesn't mean that they aren't, and Riou doesn't like to think of the people he was with as the kind of people who don't have emotions that lead to that kind of thing, even if they don't regret what they've done. Riou doesn't regret what he's done, but it's still true that he's killed people. He's experienced fear and loss and his entire sense of self was changed by being in the military. There are people who fared better and people who fared worse. He's the only one who ended up living alone in the Yokohama jungle, as far as he knows, but he also knows others have ended up in prison, fighting other unwinnable battles, disappearing, and more. ]

If they haven't lost sleep, they've lost something else. Sometimes, something more important.

[ Immediately upon hearing his words her walls seem to double in size; towering over her heart, a shadow casts over the truth and reminds her not to open up. Not that she needs a reminder at all, as the thought of even mentioning Saya in any conversation quickly ends with Yuzuriha denying her existence.

Still, what is she supposed to say about that?

A change of subject, maybe. ]

Riou-san really is a nice person. [ Her tone is somber, distant. ] But it's okay to think that negatively about people sometimes.

Hey, since we're both awake, do you mind if I tell you a little about my life?

[ There's a short pause. ]

It'll be quick. And don't worry it's not a sob story or nothin' but since you should me a little about yourself I think it's only fair.

[ And it's not like this is a piece of her that she's constantly denying, either -- even if she's lied about why her job is to a few people here already. Whoopsies. ]

[ Riou doesn't think it was a negative thought. It's reality. Sometimes, people lose parts of themselves that they can't get back, can't work past, can't be the person they used to be without. It's a reality of war, battle, trauma in general. Rather than a negative thought, he thinks it's important to acknowledge. ]

I'll listen.

[ He doesn't hesitate to offer once she says she wants to talk. Sometimes you need to trust someone to listen without judgment, sob story or not. Riou can do that. ]

So, like...

[ She pauses, almost reluctant -- even if she's not giving him any details of her past that she normally keeps locked away it still feels odd. Like she's admitting to something she shouldn't, her tongue hesitant to cooperate as she breathes out a sigh. ]

It's only ever been me all my life growing up within a shinobi village. [ Starting off with a lie, making her ease into a place more comfortable. ] They pretty much desensitize us right off the bat so we're prepared for the reality of our work; killing, being killed, since you're a solider and all I'm sure you had to have your own experience with that.

Ever heard of Sagiwa Castle? I was the one who raided the place and killed all the retainers there, but... [ Her lips curl into a smile, both amused and yet irritated. ] I got betrayed and ended up being sentenced to death, though I am at least workin' on getting a pardon for my crimes back home. [ Her words end with a drawl, a hint of disbelief in her voice when she says that. To actually believe that she or any of the other criminals shipped off to that island would actually be pardoned for their crimes seems unrealistic -- she's far from a pessimist, but realistically they couldn't replace the lives she and the others have taken. ] But y'know what? Even when they were torturing me I only thought "damn, I just wanna live" -- surviving is my priority and if that means killing then so be it, I'll sleep just fine.

[ And that's the truth, there's no questioning it -- from her gaze to the steady tone of her voice, nothing hints that she's possibly being dishonest. ]

So what I'm getting at... Is if I never lost anything important and yet I'm still like this, what does that make me?

[ He hasn't heard of Sagiwa Castle, but that's not really important to the story, so he sits and listens as he said he would. He understands, and doesn't disagree with what she said. He finds it incredibly unfair that she was betrayed if she was simply doing what she was ordered to do. Loyalty is incredibly important to him. But he doesn't speak until she asks him a question, and he takes a moment to think about his answer based on what she said. ]

You lost those you trusted when you were betrayed. You already admitted to losing sleep. You were desensitized early, which means you lost parts of your childhood. I don't think you've never lost anything.

[ That is his opinion anyway, based on what she's told him. ]

It can be easier to pretend none of that is important.

...

[ She's silent, at first, a bit taken aback by his answer; it comes from a genuine place and she immediately recognizes that, her heart betraying her the moment it strums hard against her chest. Yuzuriha can only keep her expression from faltering, even if she does briefly pan the video away from herself. ]

Saying all that with a serious tone... You've got a hell of a heart, Riou-san.

[ When it pans back her eyes narrow, lips turned into a frown. ]

But you're not gonna win me over so easily! I've still got three more walls of trust you gotta get past before I let you in on all my trauma. [ Is this a joke? She's certainly making it seem like it is by the way she gestures at the air. ] But I appreciate it... Really. If we were face-to-face right now I'd press your cheeks together and kiss you all over for being so damn cute.

So I might be a pretty shitty person, but I'll try bein' a good friend to you. Don't let anyone hear about it though, 'kay?

Everyone is entitled to privacy.

[ He likes her but he's well aware that neither of them have known each other long enough to really get into the deep levels of trauma. He takes no offense at her cutting him off before they go too deep. But he thinks it's important to let her know that she's not as far or as alone as she thinks. He doesn't know and can't know her personal experiences as she's experienced them, but she's not alone and she has someone who will listen if she wants to. ]

I've been told I barely classify as a person, but I will try being a good friend too.

[ Though he considers for a moment, and as if in response to her suggestion about cheeks and kissing, he sends her a follow-up text message: 😗 ]

[ And of course there's a piece of her who wants to shy away from this; content with lying through her teeth, with people having this perspective that she's just a natural born killer. And yet Riou, as well as a few others, don't view her as that. It's as scary as it is comfortable, a foreign warmth spreading through her chest that she instinctively wants to shake off -- but she allows it to grow, lips twisting into an embarrassed smile. ]

Who said that? I'll rough 'em up for sayin' something so rude about my Riou-san!

[ She cants her head to one side when she receives the text message, a little confused --

And then she reads it.

Hello!? Let her be the one that's affectionate not the other way around!? ]

[ He is literally gonna get a message back like this.

He's so goddamn cute!? ]

I'm seriously gonna kiss you! So much! You better be ready at all times 'cause the second I spot you anywhere I'm jumping on.

[ He doesn't respond to who it is, instead focusing on interpreting the onslaught of heart emojis. That's. A lot. He doesn't know how to respond to that. ]

I'm always ready for anything.

[ So he'll catch her if she jumps.. ]

[ Best boy... ]

Good! [ She's grinning from ear to ear, lips parting as she releases a small yawn. ] Well... That was nice gettin' some things off my chest, I think I can go to sleep nice and easy thanks to Riou-san's kindness~ [ She brings up a hand to give him a short wave. ] You should sleep, too! Maybe we'll meet each other in our dreams.

[ It doesn't work that way, but she sounds a little hopeful. ]

G'night, Riou-san!

[ She'll cut off the video after that... and go to sleep probably dreaming of Mu Dan, unfortunately.

But it's okay because she keeps to her word and really does end up jumping him the next time they meet ugh. That's her best friend. ]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

un: stickysticky ( video )

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

1/2

private

private

wow i sure did that tag at ass in the morning with 22423498 typos... anyway

no subject

no subject

no subject

1/3

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject