text, un: phantompaws

[yumenope]

It’s truly a tragedy that all the attention has been given to the mostly two legged inhabitants of this fair world. Therefore, I propose a simple solution.

Please post the most flattering picture of your feline or canine companion. We will then proceed with assigning it an arbitrary number, let’s call it one to ten, that seemingly corresponds with how fetching it is.

( yes, this is “please rate my pet”. yes, this is a mockery of rate my ass and the like. yes, he’s fully intending on rating your pets. )

Comments

[accurately]

He has crystals around his neck underneath it like many animals on this planet, but otherwise it is mostly fur.

[yumenope]

I see. So the shape is largely in part due to fluff.
A 9, to be fair.

[accurately]

Acceptable.