text, un: phantompaws

[yumenope]

It’s truly a tragedy that all the attention has been given to the mostly two legged inhabitants of this fair world. Therefore, I propose a simple solution.

Please post the most flattering picture of your feline or canine companion. We will then proceed with assigning it an arbitrary number, let’s call it one to ten, that seemingly corresponds with how fetching it is.

( yes, this is “please rate my pet”. yes, this is a mockery of rate my ass and the like. yes, he’s fully intending on rating your pets. )

Comments

[canids]

Yeah. ...You are, aren't you?

( that's what he had been told, at least? their taxonomic classification. humans might think of themselves separate from animals, but taxonomy was very important to the structure of legosi's world, and that taxonomy would only reinforce what he thought: that they were animals, just like legosi and all the people in the world he was from.

and now it's time for legosi's perception of humans to be shattered forever.

his eyes squint, and he's silent for a long moment as he slowly... slowly processes this information. humans... who dress up like other animals... well, that's not too odd. he had been to that one (highly questionable, highly illegal) club where herbivores had dressed up as carnivores and vice versa, usually to indulge societally-condemned kinks. so it's like that...? )

There's... kind of something like that where I'm from, so... I guess it could be stranger. But that was just pretending — people wouldn't actually believe they're something they're not...

( he raises a clawed hand to his chin, thinking over it some more. ) If they'd "love" seeing me, I think it might be best they - don't? ( nervous. )