Nakajima Atsushi (
tigerpoet) wrote in
prismatica2020-03-22 09:40 pm
un: tigerpoet, video
[It's Atsushi! Without his glasses, and with his hair pushed back, and looking 95% more grumpy than anyone has seen the 'usual' Atsushi, but it's definitely him.]
My other half told me that I need to make more friends. [Speech patterns are definitely Inner's, but it may come as a shock to anyone who hasn't met him yet.] I don't care, but if it'll satisfy him I'll ask.
People willing to be sparring partners preferred. No one too noisy or annoying. If the other Atsushis don't like you then I hate you already, so don't bother replying.
[This is how you friendship, right?]
My other half told me that I need to make more friends. [Speech patterns are definitely Inner's, but it may come as a shock to anyone who hasn't met him yet.] I don't care, but if it'll satisfy him I'll ask.
People willing to be sparring partners preferred. No one too noisy or annoying. If the other Atsushis don't like you then I hate you already, so don't bother replying.
[This is how you friendship, right?]

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Oh, him? He's overrated.
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I believe you mentioned you were looking for someone to spar with.
[ Cry God for Harry, England, and Saint George. Or, in other words: bring it on. ]
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And you think you could put up a fight? Please.
[He may not be the best at measuring people, but he's pretty confident he could beat up Valmont with one pinky.]
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[ It's an understandable assumption, but interestingly, Valmont's making much the same assessment of Atsushi himself. He's nearly defeated Jackie Chan in hand-to-hand combat - how much of a challenge is a writer going to be? ]
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[Surely it'll be fine when Valmont stops in and sees Atsushi holding a very real and sharp sword?]
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Well, well. You were serious.
[ All right, so this is looking like less of a sparring match and more of an actually-trying-to-maim-each-other match. That's fine. Come prepared, the man said, and come prepared he did. Not that he'd been planning to reveal his trump card quite this early, but...
Well, you know that cane that Valmont sometimes carries around with him? The one with the big red jewels in it that screams "fancy rich person"? He's brought it to this rendezvous too, and, keeping an eye on Atsushi, he now grabs the base with one hand and twists the two halves apart. Yeah, that's a sword heretofore concealed in the top half - a sword crackling with electricity, no less. Fair's fair, right? ]
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Good. You might actually put up a bit of a challenge.
[-and that's all the warning V's getting before Atsushi dashes at him to try to slice into his side. Thankfully he has enough self-control to not go for anything too permanent or, you know, deadly.]
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All right, first things first. His weapon's shorter, so he's got to get in close. Valmont feints left, then strikes right, aiming to get in under Atsushi's guard and slash him in the shoulder - or anywhere, really, he's not horribly picky. ]
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Atsushi's pain tolerance is high and he barely flinches at the wound before pressing the attack, slicing at Valmont's sword arm.]
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...Have you considered getting that seen by a doctor?
[ Not that he's all too inclined to care about this Atsushi's well-being, but ink-for-blood does seem like a fairly serious condition. He's just saying.
The downside of being in this close is that it's a lot harder to dodge. Valmont backsteps, but not quickly enough, and Atsushi's strike gets him in the upper arm. Hissing in pain and rage, he clutches the wounded area with his opposite hand. ]
You're going to reimburse me for this suit, of course.
[ He circles around Atsushi as he speaks, on the defensive for now, but keeping an eye out for an opening. ]
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[An answer to both the question and whether he's going to pay for the suit.]
That suit was ugly anyway. I'm doing you a favor.
[Can he piss Valmont off enough to make him lower his guard?]
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Ugly?! You're one to talk, you - you -
[ Let's be real, of course he can. The majority of Valmont's brainpower is currently allocated to finding an epithet strong enough to hurl at Atsushi and his subpar fashion sense, which means he might not be quite as focused on what's in front of him as he needs to be. Now might be a good time to strike. ]
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He tilts it up, even though he doesn't really have to to make eye contact.]
Surrender.
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Or what? You'll read your books at me?
[ He's pretty sure Atsushi wouldn't actually kill him, if it came down to it. ...Pretty sure. ]
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If you consider that a threat, you really aren't cultured at all.
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Prove it, then. Surely you have a copy or two lying around.
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[Yes, he does have some books around, but if Valmont wanted somebody to read to him he's talking to the wrong Atsushi.]
Yield.
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Fine. You win, this time. Now put your blasted sword away before you do any more damage!
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You're dismissed.
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Tell your "other half" I'll be speaking with him shortly.
[ And so saying, Valmont gathers up the bottom part of his cane and beats it out of there. He's going to have Words with his preferred version of Atsushi, and they're going to mostly consist of "other you sucks."*
(* "and also can I borrow one of your books now I'm curious") ]