audio | un: steinbeck

[graftage]

[There's the sound of someone clearing their throat.]

I don't know, I guess I just wanted to get this off my chest. See if this has happened to anyone else. It still feels weird to me to even think about it, but...

[A long sigh.]

Anyways. My name's John Steinbeck. And where I come from, that was just a regular name with no other meanings attached to it. Coming here, though, I happen to get lots of people askin' about some kind of author. Seems like he has the same name as me. Which is like, sure, guess the name could be common.

[There's a pause.]

And then, a really good friend of mine gave me one of his novels, and...its bizarre. The names of the characters have the same names as my family. The situation in the book is stuff that I'm familiar with, too. It's just....weird. And I guess I just wanted to ask if, like, this is something people have even experienced, knowing that there's some other YOU out there in a different world who you weren't even aware of. I know people come from different worlds. But has anyone found out about another version of themselves or whatever through talking to people around here? Or is there anyone else who has actually met their own selves here? I guess that could be a thing.

[World dimensional shenanigans, oh my!]

...Thanks for listening. [A beat.] And before anyone asks, no, I've never written a single thing in my life.

Sgt. Panty's Lonely Hearts Club ► AUDIO

[angelshot]

Y'know what? Cupid's an asshole and I'm a pro at this. So gather round, my clueless little nerd babies. I'm gonna learn ya how the schmoopy hearts and candies routine works.

[ Oh boy, here we go. Wherever she is, Panty shifts gears into a relatively convincing infomercial voice - artificially bubbly and utterly vapid, with that not-so-subtle wheedling note perfected by most used car salesmen. So very trustworthy. ]

Do you spend a lot of time being a sadsack at home? Are you single? Do you whack off and cry yourself to sleep every night? Does the idea of judging someone on all their life choices in 5 minutes get you all hot and bothered? Are you naive enough to believe in true love at first sight?

Of course you are. Allow me to introduce your new best friend:

~ SPEED DATING ~

Free of charge, obviously, because the entertainment value is priceless.
So the way I figure, what's the point of having everyone mope by themselves if it's more fun to lump 'em all together and have a massive party, right? All you gotta do is show up, fib a bit about your rocket scientist degree and how you won five gold medals in the olympics, trade numbers with some hotties, blah blah blah. You get the idea. Just checking for interest first and all that crap.

Probably gonna be pretty informal n' stuff. Indoors? Outdoors? Potluck? Lemme know what you're feelin' more. If someone wants to bring a munchies like a fruit plate and a chocolate fountain for fondue, go for it. I'm not allowed in a ten meter radius of one since the last "incident".




[ Edit: The LOG is now up! Have fun! ]

text | un: fantasma

[teaserving]

hey you fucking idiots i'm engaged
so i need some tricks and tips for planning a marriage
assuming any of you have any damned clue how to help

that's right the advice guy coming for advice
sober this time even
it's amazing

anyway best thing about this whole thing is that giorno giovanna won't be there
event of the year automatically

( text, un: koriel )

[passio]

Is anyone else suddenly lactating?