text, anonymous

[uncleasshole]

so i'm not stupid enough to assume there aren't doctors around here or whatever

any around that won't ask questions?

Comments

[trenchdoting]

Why?

[uncleasshole]

like i said: no questions.

[trenchdoting]

Wait a second pal, does that mean no questions at all??

[uncleasshole]

n o n e. nada. zilch. doesn't need to be a big deal.

[trenchdoting]

Hold it right there, pal! But you just answered the question I asked about no questions! That's what lawyers would call a contradiction, pal!

[uncleasshole]

i don't give a shit what lawyers call it

context, "pal". you're focusing on the wrong thing. you know anyone or not?

[trenchdoting]

Now I'm just plain confused here, pal. Am I allowed to answer questions?

[uncleasshole]

yes.

let me explain nice and slow

i am asking for a doctor. i do not want to discuss why i am asking for a doctor. i just want to know if there are any.

[trenchdoting]

Well of course there are plenty of doctors out there! I don't know any personally, but they exist. And I don't wanna toot my own horn, but I know a thing or two about first aid myself!

Text: un: wanderer

[seawanderer]

The only question I would ask is how severe the injury is and if magic would help or hinder the healing.

[uncleasshole]

couple cuts and scrapes. might need stitches.

[seawanderer]

I am capable enough for that. Come see me if you wish.

[ Maglor sends a location to Nick's comm. ]

[resenting]

Not a doctor, but I do sell potions for injuries and illnesses.

I don't give enough of a shit to ask follow up questions one way or another.

[uncleasshole]

potions do anything for outward stuff? cuts and scrapes and shit.

[resenting]

That's what they're best at. They're meant for adventures to patch themselves up after dealing with monsters.

Should work just fine to deal with whatever you shouldn't have been doing.

[uncleasshole]

cool. i got a guy to help right now but i might take you up on those later.

never thought i'd be asking for "potions".

un: sparkler

[liberaltus]

I do not know of any healers among us who can do so in a conventional way.

I've magic and potions at my disposal, useful for injuries, particularly nasty ones, they can mend flesh and bone. Depending on the disease you have they can be quite helpful in that regard as well.

However, if you've gone and lodged something small up your nose or any other orifice, and you cannot get it out, you'd be quite out of luck.

[So vivid.]

[uncleasshole]

don't worry, i'm not snorting marbles or shit. you'd think with all the people these fuckers kidnap, at least some of them would be doctors.

whatever. i'll take what i can get.

[liberaltus]

Excellent, well I am available if and when you need a fix, granted while I have no intention of asking about your malady I'd need to know the nature of it. Right tool for the job and all that.

[uncleasshole]

that's fine. i got someone right now but i'll remember this for next time.

un: w

[kekw]

[ Oh this is going to be fun. ]

Oh, cos you said no question I'll just take a wild guess it's something embarrassing like erectile dysfunction or sort.

I'm sorry, but that stuff is a bit of a lost cause.

Re: un: w

[uncleasshole]

ok i can see where you might assume that and it'd be a lot funnier if that was the case but trust me, that's still working fine

text | un: Оцелотовая Хватка

[ocelthot]

Is this going to be a dick problem?

[uncleasshole]

no, thank god

[ocelthot]

Points for originality then.

{ text }

[aceso]

Will a nurse work?

[uncleasshole]

sure. i'm covered for now but good to know there's someone out there

text; un: shigeru

[mysophobic]

Doctor patient confidentiality is rather important so I try to uphold that as best I can.

So if you'd like to speak in private I'm definitely here to listen!

[uncleasshole]

sounds good. never know who knows how to keep their mouth shut these days. i'll remember that

[mysophobic]

Well I guess there's the added bonus that I'm mute?

[ Shigeru no!!! But he honestly said it in jest. ]

But if you ever need anything please don't hesitate to drop by the hospital! If you ask for Shigeru Miyata I'll be ready to help you out!

un: doctorize

[doctorize]

I have questions, but as a doctor, I would keep them between you and me via doctor-patient confidentiality.

[uncleasshole]

good. never thought i'd actually be happy to see doctors around here.

now private

[doctorize]

Indeed. As such, we can speak privately away from the network, unless you would prefer discussing this in person instead?

un: greengrassing

[ex_empoison405]

I'd be lying if I said I wasn't tempted to ask so I would know and can help give you advice on how to not let this situation happen again.

But I will be glad to keep it between us if you'd like some patching up and maybe even some medicine!

[uncleasshole]

knowing me, it's gonna happen again no matter what. but thanks for the offer. i got a guy