prismatica | ☽ I: video

[The video flicks on to reveal a figure silhouettes against the red moon glowing full overhead behind them. It looks like Vanitas has somehow gotten onto the roof of somewhere and is perched very precariously on the edge, his hair ruffled. For as dim as his face is in the darkness it's clear that he's grinning widely, his teeth looking almost suspiciously sharp and his blue eyes glowing with what seems to be red.]

Hello, fellow Moonblessed! To those of you who I haven't met yet, my name is Vanitas.

[Briefly the video becomes a blur as he spins to face the moon, gesturing to it broadly as the red glow washes over him.] Where I come from this sort of red moon usually heralds the birth of beings known as vampires. But it's a shame that such doesn't seem to be the case here, you know?

[He laughs, the sound just a bit manic.] You might be wondering why... It's simple- I'm a doctor to vampires, and without any patients it's just impossible for me to do my job! And I'm a very busy man, you know... So I'd like to make an offer to all of you!

If there are any vampires here, I want you to let me test something on you! If you're inhuman but not a vampire I suppose I could still try it on you, really... So what do all of you say?

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Well, I seem to have woken up this evening with the ears of a merperson and the tail of a lamia. Which, normally, I would have pinned to someone having spiked my IPA...
...and on saying that, I realize I may be too generous in assuming I ought to write that off on grounds of assumption that I've escaped the unending frivolous absurdity and wanton chaos-making of partying with monster high schoolers.

[Wow, Liam. Too many words... spoil the broth...]

While, no, I can't refute that, it fails to change how it prompts anyone with an analytical brain cell in their skull to call your accountability into question.
What if some poor, underserved creature of the night signs themselves on for what they BELIEVE to be a clinical trial of a high-plasma gluten-free blood substitute for times of scarcity, only to find themselves getting pressured into chugging never-filtered holy water to "test the efficacy" of an "improved" line of "pentagram patches"?
(I imagine "improved" in this case would mean that the ink is only marginally less soluble in the face of soap and water. I sigh that nowhere in the social media backlash against Bacchanalbarn did I spot a single simple-minded laymonster bring up the low-hanging fruit that is the irony of a product washing off with water after two days when its purpose is, in fact, to WITHSTAND ((holy)) WATER.)

[Yeah, um. ...That's not the topic right now.

Wasn't, at least.]

[Yeah Vanitas seems to have more or less ignored the first part, picking and choosing the topics to focus on almost on a whim]

Holy water? What does that have to do with anything?

Whatever, I don't need to do any of that! All I need to do is see if my book has any effect on vampires not native to my world. There's a high probability that it won't, but I wouldn't be very good at my job if I just let that sort of question go unanswered, you know?

[Uh -- rude.

(And by that I mean good, he's justified.)]

Um, I was clearly using that as a hypothetical example.
...Of what you could easily be hiding behind a rather... "sketchy" lack of disclosure between yourself and your patients, prospective or otherwise.
Which segues right into that! By "book", you mean... what?
A blood grimoire? A consecrated tome? A haunted medical dictionary?

I suppose "grimoire" is the most apt descriptor. But there's no blood involved or anything like that.

[Well. There could be. Hypothetically. But that's not what he uses it for.]

Describing how it works to someone not from my world is a bit of a pain since it will go right over your head, so I'll keep it simple. It alters world formulas and can remove or inflict curses on vampires of my world. But since I've been hearing that vampires from other places work in a fundamentally different way it's entirely possible that nothing at all would happen.

And let me guess: you'd be testing the lifting of curses by...

[Ahh, lighten up, Liam - you've been subjected and/or played spectator to wayyyyyy weirder and riskier "let's test this out"s than this train of thought.]

Well I WAS just going to see if the book did anything at all, but if you're suggesting I try a curse that would probably be a better idea~

[Okay he was thinking it from the start but it sounds less shady if it seems like someone else suggested it, right?]

Nonsense. I am not "suggesting" anything, and you know it!

[Does he, though, Liam? Does he?]

If you need a vampire to test the effects of the book, and the book is capable of lifting or casting curses on vampires, then it logically follows that at least ONE part of your plan is to test that.
How were you planning to test any part of that on un-cursed vampires?

Oh, do I?

If a vampire isn't from my world then it's very possible that even cursing them will have no effect, so I just want to try a variety of things. But I'll be gentle!

[OH, DON'T GET FRESH WITH - nah, I mean. By all means do, because... Liam pretty much started it.

But still, hfffff...]

You do... have a point.

[Different magics... do... work differently between different dimensions...

...mmmnnnngggg, his brain's frickin' vibrating, so the whole thing's gambling and it'd look so frickin' good for him if he - ]

You know what?

[Yeeeeeeees...?]

I'll volunteer.
But only because I consider it a favorable sacrifice for vampirekind.
If SOMEONE must accept the risks, then it should be someone who's blisslessly aware of them enough to serve as the noble reluctant.

[Wow. That's a healthy attitude to have.]

[Even if Liam can't see it Vanitas is grinning a little madly on the other side. Finally.]

Wonderful! But don't worry, I'm not interested in stuff like sacrifices or making anyone a martyr since that would be a waste. And stupid.

[And he doesn't really like anyone enough to give them that sort of good name.]

And I'll even let you pick where we meet.

☽ I: video

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