prismatica | anonymous text post

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There are some questions that I have been mulling over for quite some time now. As someone who has returned home once before and returned back to Prismatica with their memories in tact on multiple occasions (apparently some people return, only to be a blank slate), I've had the utmost displeasure of experiencing a harrowing bit of dissonance: My obligation to the world I grew up in, and the freedom I craved in such a liberating sandbox environment as Prismatica. The longer I allow myself to settle down here, the more reluctant I am to leave, and each subsequent ping-ponging back and forth (especially against my own will) leaves me with a heavier heart.

Seeing such a varying degree of opinions both on the network and in person, I've always been curious as to how people feel about their status as a "moonblessed" citizen and in turn, their unpredictable predicament.

If and when the day of reckoning and/or returning is upon us (and should the higher powers be so kind to provide us a choice at all), would you ever wish to return back to your own pocket of the universe? Or multiverse, if Prismatica is indeed set within a different universe altogether?

What would hold you back?

Or if there is nothing holding you back:

what would you take back with you (memories, tangible items, people, etc)?

Or! Bonus question:

In an ideal situation, (let's just throw all propriety to the wind here for a moment) how would you like things to be? This one might be a tricky one. I think this could also easily tie in to the second question, for reasons I assume I don't have to spell out.

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I do not want to return home
There are things here that I could not have in my world
Bonds that would need to be broken...
I don't want that

Forgetting my memories of this world would be too cruel
My relationships
My friends
They hold great value to me
Given the choice, I would choose to stay

The only thing I would ask for is a way to contact my family
I would want to let them know that I am well
And that I am happy

Forgetting would truly be terrible.
While it did create some unpleasant stirrings in my heart, I am glad I did not forget anything.
Certainly helped me grow from it.

A way to communicate between time and space would be quite a feat.
Something I'd wish for as well.

Nothing else really tying you to your home, then?

Yes
If I could, I would like to send a letter to them
Physical proof so that they know that I am thinking of them
And that I made this choice for myself

But there is nothing else
All that I need is here

[ all of this... is extremely Relevant to him. and he doesn't like it. ]

haha, i actually ... came here from another place entirely

[ ... wait ]

err, what i mean is, the place i was in before prismatica was another place where i'd been taken there against my will, across like... universes? i guess? or whatever

some of the people who were there with me came along here, somehow

some of them didn't remember at first, others it was like we never parted

but all in all... i don't really know how to answer this stuff... though i do know what you mean. your home is your home, but the longer you spend away from it and the longer you're settled in a new place, the more that the new place becomes "home". leaving it gets harder and harder to think about

i miss my friends from home. but i've also been gone for about 3 years... it's really weird to think back on my hometown and the last thing i was doing there before i got ripped out of my life and thrown into space... it's like... that person isn't me anymore. not just due to aging and stuff, but going back now, after everything i've been through, seems more scary than staying here forever because i don't know if i could get used to it again

i guess what i will say, no matter what happens, i don't want to forget any of it. forgetting it means forgetting people i love... and if we were to part...

i'd rather live with the pain than not. because those memories are important.

A more personalized touch.
That sounds nice, actually.

I'm glad you have something so resolute in your life.

Makes sense. It would be like going to Mars after I get kicked off of Prismatica.

I understand that feeling. Not being able to get used to it again, that is. "Home" was so limited to me, followed a strict standard of rules under the guise of an open world. Being able to make my own choices and follow my own path in Prismatica makes me wonder if I'll simply go insane if I return.

That gave me a thought: What if we really aren't that person anymore on a much more... meta scale? If the existence of multiple universes stand true, wouldn't it make sense that perhaps there are alternate versions of us as well? Perhaps there is a version of us still walking the same path as we'd started, or many other versions of us all walking down similar paths but branching off into different endings and this is just one of them. It's partially wishful thinking, but also can't help but believe this theory has some merit to it.

That's a good sentiment.
I believe in that wholeheartedly as well.
Thank you for sharing.

It would be all that I ask for

Months ago, I may have faltered
But I am certain of my decision now
More certain than I have ever been

I have obligations I must return to, and frankly, I prefer my world to this one.

On the matter of forgetting, I am far less certain.

Fair.
I imagined most people who are unhappy/indifferent here either had homes that were perfectly fine, friends/family/loved ones, and/or had business to tend to.

Do you care to elaborate?

I could take the option or leave it, in all honesty.
Contact would probably get awkward on my end.
Can't hurt though.

Would you say that it was solely because of your new environment that led you to be more confident in your decisions?

Edited 2020-10-23 15:38 (UTC)

If it is awkward, then a letter would be best

[ ngl that's why he wants a letter... less chance of dealing with his family's feelings. that's cowardly!! but oh well. ]

Yes
Being here has helped me in many ways, I think
Before, I was more reserved

I would have wanted to stay regardless
But it would have caused tension
I'm confident of my decision now

[ Does he care to elaborate? Well--

It's not like this person knows who he is (probably), and he did engage in the conversation. ]

Lunatia has not been easy on my marriage.

It would be simpler to wipe the slate clean, and less painful besides not to remember the friends I will not see again.

i miss my friends back home a lot

but they're really all i would ever want to go back for

i don't have any family there anymore that isn't here with me (it was just me and my brother and he's here now) and shit kinda went really south right before i left anyway

ive been gone for so damn long at this point im not even sure what it would feel like to go back

hell i went back for like five days and it basically just got worse so returning here was a blessing

also im kinda getting married next month to someone who isn't from assiah so i'd also be leaving her behind

{ the cowardly and uncowardly route are both very tempting... }

Good luck and perhaps some diligence has been on your side then.
It worked out for you and that's a happy ending if I've ever seen one.

{ buuuut henry already knew this from what he could recall from that future portal. the fact that doumeki and yashiro work so well together in such a place like Prismatica is almost heartwarming. he's honestly glad for them. }

I see. There's really no easy way to compromise, is there? Especially if you practice monogamy.

Simpler, true. I can't argue with that. But would you really wish to forget them? Is their memory not worth it?

{ He's mostly playing Devil's Advocate here, but he's also been slowly making...friends...and more... so this conversation interests him more than he'd like to admit. He'd usually be the first one on-board the Clean Slate train, and yet... }

Then perhaps as mentioned in a different thread, would you much rather send a letter telling them of your situation and be done with it? Or perhaps wish for an interdimensional pen-pal set up? :)

A good escape, then. Having your brother here is good. Makes me almost wish mine showed up too, but... well, maybe it's for the best he didn't.

Wow, only five days? Your home sounds like one of those places that are fine to visit every once in a blue moon but otherwise is best avoided like the plague.

Congratulations. Met her here in Prismatica, you mean?

Getting heavy on the public network, huh?

I would have to go home. The people there, my wife, my coworkers, my job, my city, it's... basically half of who I am. As nice as this place is, I'm a stranger here, and being separated has been painful.

Uh, that being said, I'd probably like to have all my memories with me. Some photos, too. It's really important to me that I remember. If no one remembers or feels its effects, then it didn't matter at all. I want this to matter.

As for an ideal situation: it'd be great to be able to visit this place from my own universe.

[ Henry can't see it, but the scoff Cardan gives at being accused of practicing monogamy is highly offended.......... which may or may not be the reason his marriage is not doing so hot in the first place. ]

My forgetting would hardly affect them, nor would my remembering.

Would you choose to remember?

[ What he's not saying is that either way, he will outlive most of his mortal companions by centuries, maybe millenia. The kind of goodbye proposed by leaving Lunatia is not so dissimilar to that. ]

{ Maybe he'd be less annoyed if he knew Henry meant it as a general You... but alas, text.

His response is interesting, though. Curiously apathetic (from a Stoic standpoint, anyway). It's not a mindset that he himself comes across often. Of course, one statement does not make a person. He doesn't know this guy. The statement merely makes him curious. }

I see.

I would. I like the person I have become because if them, despite what my past self would've believed. Whether it's improved my quality of life or not I've yet to fully discover, but life is short. It's worth the attempt.

I think it's appropriately heavy enough for a public network.

Makes sense. Especially when you've already settled into a certain lifestyle back home with people you're bonded to, that certainly sounds harder to deal with.

So you view Prismatica more as a place you could consider a possible tourist spot. A place you'd like to visit but not to live. I can see the appeal. The ability to move freely between worlds would put me at ease, too.

What if your loved ones were here with you? Would that change your mind at all?
Or does it have to be the entire package (city, friends, job, etc)?

I feel that would change my mind to return home drastically.

{ Even if he would miss Earth as a whole with its cultures and familiarity, he certainly wouldn't miss his circumstances. }

By what I assume to be pure luck, most people I know (and don't hate) are here already, plus I can access a decent amount of information -- so I'm not certain how necessary it is to return.

It puts a damper on my goal of archiving Earth knowledge, but I suppose that can be on pause until I return, if I do.

Yeah, kind of, although I was thinking less of a tourist spot and more of a place that I ought to just pay a visit to. Same way someone returns to their home town every once in a while. Not for any attractions, just to check in.

That... might. But to really convince me to choose between having my loved ones here or back home, you'd have to move entire towns. Even then, every time I step outside and see a weird moon in the sky or a Prismal on the street, I'm reminded that I don't belong here. I only ever fit in just enough. Never wholly.

Edited 2020-10-26 15:54 (UTC)

That does sound much nicer.

I suppose that would be just jarring enough. Might as well just be back home at that point if you'd need to go as far to invite the entire town, huh?

I think if I just had the right person with me, I'd find a way to integrate into such a foreign society. Or just not care. That's just me, anyway. I've been fortunate enough to live in various cities and adjust accordingly to have developed a sense for it.

That is quite the luck. I've always wondered how I'd feel if the people that could actually tolerate back home were to join me here as well.

Archiving Earth knowledge? Like backing up all the pages on Wikipedia or something? 🤔

And would your mind change if your life was not so short?

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