video

[lumberlady]

[Good morning, Lunatia. The video starts with a view of hooves, a too close view of a face... and then finally... a centaur? Who keeps looking off screen while she talks and never seems to actually focus on the lens correctly.]

Hello? Can everyone see me? Connor, am I doing this right? Okay? ... Okay.

[She clears her throat and dips into a bow, the camera bobbing along with her.]

Hello! This is Konoha... some of you maybe think my name is Shizu, but- It's Konoha! I'm from Echigo province, in Japan, if you know it... and I'll be in your care.

If you don't know me, which, I figure is most of you, this city must be even bigger than the capital I'm the... well in my world we say jinba but I'm the "centaur". I haven't seen anyone else like me so I think I can say "the"...

Anyway... what I wanted to ask was... if anyone had an recommendations for... shops? I've never really shopped before, and I haven't seen any locals quite like me, so if you know somewhere that does... I don't know, tailoring? Or a restaurant with really big seats or tall tables? Anything like that!

I'd appreciate it, so... thank you very much!

[Another bow, another bob of the camera... and a blurry flash of android helping her turn the dang thing off. Thanks, Connor.]

Comments

[ateaist]

I don’t mind fooling around lass, but if you’re thinking “Nobunaga Oda can’t be a woman” I’d keep it to yourself before I make jinba extinct around here.

[SHE’S THREATENED TO DECAPITATE FOR LESS.]

1/2

[lumberlady]

[... okay so she'd been thinking that but]

[lumberlady]

But there can't be... two of you...

[ateaist]

And what exactly do you think Japan would look like without me around? It’s a constant in every timeline...probably.

I’m pretty much the most important person in the country’s entire history.

[So she says.]

There are likely infinite Nobunagas all across infinite Japans, be they man woman or otherwise. What’s hard to accept about that?

[lumberlady]

[... okay, it. Kind of makes sense... When she... says it like that...

They were important, she thinks...]

I guess just like... most of it... sort of...

[ateaist]

Well, if we part ways and you can take a single thing from this conversation, let it be this!

Don’t sweat the small stuff!

[lumberlady]

If you're also Nobunaga... Do you drink from skulls too?

[ateaist]

Haha, that’s right! Now you’re getting it!

Those guys were lousy samurai but they made excellent cups!

[lumberlady]

[Even if they're not actually Nobunaga... Who cheerfully admits to drinking from skulls?]

Oh, alright, well... I'm just going to... go, then...

[ateaist]

What? Oh don’t be so sensitive, it was the style at the time! Trends come and go!

[lumberlady]

Just because there were wars going on doesn't make that a "trend"...

[ateaist]

...well, they were really nice cups you know. I paid a lot to have them converted like that.

[So there?]

[lumberlady]

That... doesn't make it better?

[also u nobunagas kind of ruined her species' lives... in a way]

[ateaist]

It’s not like I did it thinking it wasn’t wrong. I just wanted to do it.

It isn’t that hard to understand.

[lumberlady]

That doesn't make it better either?!

[ateaist]

I suppose...good grief, I’d ask if you were a companion of that Azai if I didn’t know any better. It’s not like it’s the worst thing I’ve ever done.

[lumberlady]

If you're really Oda Nobunaga, then you've done a lot of awful things. I've heard the stories.

[ateaist]

Right! Exactly! I’m a demon king to my core!

So isn’t it a little strange you’re so hung up on that one little thing?!

[She doesn’t even sound mad, just confused.]

[lumberlady]

[Konoha is so confused WHAT IS THIS CONVERSATION]

I'm not just hung up on this one thing, I'm not sure I should be talking to a demon king?!

1/2

[ateaist]

Whaaaaaaat? It’s not like I bite~

[ateaist]

Really now...it’s not like I strut around cutting heads off these days.

You should just get to know me and decide for yourself like you would anyone.

[lumberlady]

... So you're saying you've changed?

[ateaist]

More like retired. Japan’s unified after all, so I’ve earned some R&R as far as I’m concerned.

There’s no real purpose to violence for the sake of violence.

[lumberlady]

...

[Was that believable? nfkelwn She doesn't know this is A Lot. NO real purpose to violence sounds good but didn't they just talk really nonchalantly about violence...]

What do you do here, then?

[ateaist]

Haha! Well, this world’s an interesting place; you can make quite a living if you’re active enough.

It’s really quite the enjoyable setup they’ve got.