[video]

[husbun]

[The video feed opens to Yarne’s face entirely too close to the camera. He holds his phone in both hands, clearly unused to using such a device, and slowly pushes it away from him.]

Hmm... [His hum is a little louder than it should be.] How do you know if this thing is...Hey! H-how’s it going?

[His long, furry ears droop. This already feels lame, but he’s determined.]

So...there’s been a lot of stuff going on, hasn’t there? And it all seems pretty dangerous, too! I’m used to dangerous things, really, but I thought it would be better if I kept to my apartment for a while and, um...conserved my strength. For later.

[Yarne can already hear his mother yelling at him in his head. There's a pause here as he tries to convince himself he sounds believable, but then he continues.]

So, I’ve been thinking! I need to get out more, and it’s not just because I don’t have any Chroma or food left. Or because I’m worried my muscles will atrophy, leaving me in all sorts of dangerous situations where I could die. [The drama!] But there are some extenuating circumstances, you see, and...I was wondering if there’s anyone strong out there who’d be willing to protect me? In return, I’ll let you pet my ears! That’ll earn both of us lots of Chroma, right? So, it’d be beneficial to both of us, and you’d be my own personal knight! Kind of.

[He’s ending on a smile because, truly, this sounds like an absolutely wonderful idea.]

That’s it, I think! If there’s anyone strong out there who wants to protect me and earn some Chroma, you should let me know! The stronger, the better, as far as I’m concerned. And there’s no one softer than a Taguel, I can promise that.

Comments

video

[husbun]

Hah, I wish I knew what god I angered!

[Oh, right, it was Grima? Never mind. Yarne answers vaguely and unhelpfully, failing to bring more understanding to the situation. He's good at that.]

I was born being this unlucky!

video

[tactically]

Oh?

[It's okay. Fortunately(???) for Yarne, Gilgamesh doesn't need or even want to understand. He just wants to be entertained. And it sounds like there's a story here, so he asks:]

How so?

Re: video

[husbun]

Well...I'm the last of my kind, so every step I take is burdened with the threat of extinction. I'm surprised my heart hasn't given out already! But I have to keep going for the sake of my culture.

[Is that dramatic enough? Usually, people either tell him he's an idiot or buy right into it, and he's not sure which way this will go...]

video

[tactically]

Hmm. [He contemplates this. It is very dramatic. In other words, his favorite.] Yes, I suppose that's understandable. That is a heavy burden indeed.

[The drama is intriguing, but truthfully, the situation is also a bit relatable, too. For better or for worse, he's invested now.]

On the other hand, it sounds like you might need more than just a bodyguard.

[husbun]

R-right?! No one even tries to understand! I know my life isn't worth any more than the next guy's, but...it's still different!

[He likes this person. Yarne continues talking, now under the assumption that this man is completely on his side.]

I'd like all sorts of people nearby. A personal doctor would be a good start. Oh, and an expert in healthy cooking. Also, having a good mage is always helpful, too. But settling for a knight is part-time knight is the first step!

[tactically]

[Gilgamesh can't even say that's unreasonable, really. While having people doting on him was more of a pain than anything, he was also a person who enjoyed extravagance, so he gets it. Whether it was out of necessity or desire (or maybe both), he understands.]

I would argue that those may be of more use to you here than a knight, but I imagine there are no shortage of knights or bodyguards present, regardless. [He could think of a few off the top of his head, though he didn't know (or care) if they were looking for work at the moment.] But it is good to start small. You may be stuck here for a while, so you should prepare for anything.

[He shouldn't be encouraging this sort of thing but here we are.]

[husbun]

If there's one good thing that's going for this place, it's that at least I can afford to pay one I find one.

[He's nodding over the video feed, because yeah! You right, fam! He might be stuck here for a while, so why not sell his body for a knight? It's like Holding Out for a Hero, but not quite as good as the Shrek 2 version.]

You sound you like you know a lot. Is there anything else I should be preparing for maybe? When you say that, it makes me feel anxious.

[tactically]

Of course I know a lot. I know everything there is and will ever be to know. [Barring many specific clairvoyance-hindering circumstances. That is not at all the point of why Yarne said that but Gilgamesh can and will take every moment to flex.] My advice would be to be cautious of your environment. Many things that may at first appear to be innocuous may be more troublesome than you think. Rarely dangerous, however. Probably.

[?!]