text. un: dracula.

[goneforawalk]

hello everyone i have an interesting request

you see something has been brought to my attention and i just can't let it go without learning the answer

i'm sure most of us know the general blood-drinking lore, right

that virgin blood is the best blood and non-virgin blood just can't compare, because purity is important or something

but that's not why i'm here

i'm here for a vastly different comparison

vegetarians vs meat eaters

i've been drinking from nazis, ghouls, and other vampires for so long that i just don't know if i've even had a vegetarian, how sad is that

my point here is: i'm looking for blood donors, both vegetarian and meat eating, to make a comparison

the virgin thing doesn't matter, just what you eat, that's all i'll be comparing in this exercise

you have my word as a gentleman that if you decide to donate, i won't take too much

or turn you into a vampire

or kill you

even if you're into that kind of thing i might get in trouble with my mas~ter if i misbehave too badly

anyway, just some food for thought

feel free to weigh in with your opinion if you've had both sides of the coin

Comments

text | un: fantasma

[teaserving]

you've been talking to mista havent you

[goneforawalk]

he made me curious

[teaserving]

half the shit that comes out of his mouth is ridiculous but ok
anyway
you can have some of mine if you want

text;

[itsknighttime]

wow i mean yea what fuckin moron doesnt know you wanna check a dude for their v card before you open a vein?
noobs thats who
like the last time i turned to my bro and i said bro you know whos fuckin dumb?
people who dont know the grades of blood based on level of how much dick youve got put in different places
and he was like
duh
who fuckin doesnt know that
its such common knowledge
in fact a thing we get taught before we get taught to walk
my first words were virgin blood

thanks for the subtext about not murdering people too thats openly benevolent of you

[goneforawalk]

it's a valid question i don't know the answer to

ah, i didn't want to ask directly, but i've definitely thought about it

[teaserving]

well im not gonna lie
i have too
how do you want it vlad

[goneforawalk]

nice font very good aesthetic

i suppose it would track that someone without vampire lore wouldn't know but it's literally the first question people ask me 99% of the time, if the virgin thing is true

so it's a bit old to tread over and over

oh i wouldn't go so far as to call it benevolent, even sarcastically

i'm domesticated at best.

Text;

[stabbersinyerfambles]

going to put all that blood weirdness to the side for a bit

but i still grew up a hunter so

theres a reason we hunted rabbits and deer and boar instead of wolves may be itd apply to what your asking

[goneforawalk]

hmm

i think we should discuss this the next time i see you

[itsknighttime]

awh man dont do that i got to see this color every time i type
now theyre perpetually virgin words
look
look at them
thats all im going to see from now on

i got vampire movies but thats as far as that shit goes
i should have but didnt even think there would be vampires here
good thing i love garlic bread

oh okay cool
so youre a vampire butler
theres a teabag joke somewhere in there to be made but im not brave enough to make it and im busy weighing out if god is pissed off at me for not believing in him enough that maybe i can change my mind and hang a few sickass torture ts around

[goneforawalk]

it definitely makes sense

ghoul and vampire blood taste awful in comparison to human blood, probably for obvious reasons

i'm interested in seeing if such a small difference will also affect the result

[teaserving]

i like the sound of that

text; un: pewpewsp;

[grilletto]

HOLY SHIT
YOU’RE REALLY GONNA MAKE THIS HAPPEN!!

[goneforawalk]

hey i didn't call them virgin words you did

also i'm immune to garlic

i'm actually not the butler, there's a human for that, i'd never butle

however i am the clean up crew, so to speak

(also immune to crosses)

[goneforawalk]

me too

when are you free

[teaserving]

we can make it a date tomorrow evening
is your place ok?

[goneforawalk]

oh yes that's fine

i'll be home

[goneforawalk]

well

i'm not a liar

so yes

[itsknighttime]

i did because ill never unsee it and i wanted to share the pain and suffering you inflicted

fuck
actually double fuck because immune to crosses
or youre lying and youre not but ill never know

okay
you know how like sometimes people say dont talk to strangers
then you get pulled into a world that youre not in and you end up talking to strangers who then tell you that theyre vampires and also clean up crew but arent a butler
so you ask yourself well self what do they clean up? then you dont want to know because you bet your ideas are safer than the truth? you ever have a moment like that? i did once
i feel like that applies to me so hard
so relatable
if only we had facebook id put minions on it and post it to my soccer mom book club

[teaserving]

should i bring anything?

[stabbersinyerfambles]

some beastkin dont mind the taste of rot

but aye theres more to it than the taste

beastkin who only eat plants and the like just have better meat all around

so is that really all you eat? blood?

[goneforawalk]

i'm not suffering :)

oh i don't lie, that's one thing i never do

one i have no idea what minions or facebook are

two having a sense of worry is healthy

three don't get too panicky i'm a vampire hunter

i clean up vampires

ghouls

nazis

nazi vampires

nazi ghouls

you get the picture

i don't do werewolves though that's not my jurisdiction

text | un: fantasma

[teaserving]

I FUCKING KNEW YOU WERE BEHIND THIS

[itsknighttime]

wow a happy face and everything
my dude savage
god damn man you go for the throat
pun intended
or maybe you dont idk your story
lucky you about minions though

a vampire hunting nazi hater
i hate that you telling me that makes me believe it and that those things exist or existed

yeah no fuck those guys right?
twilight taught us all about those bitches

[lifehacker]

oh fuck there really is dracula dick around here. that chain message was right
anyway you can't bite me because i'm pretty sure it would be jizz instead of blood