[Text; UN: turntechGodhead]

[itsknighttime]

ok since ive been here a hot minute i guess i can say hi again

so hi i guess
i went the fuck home and i was chilling enjoying my god damn life
like literal god damned not even not god like
hanging out with my best bro but fuck me amiright?
its cool though there were some p chill bitches here last time
bitches not in the female way
i mean there were nice girls here in the female way but they werent bitches like bitch bitches
but just bitches in the bitches way
you know
friends

fuck
im not backspacing it
i said it yall were cool bitches and im glad you were
ok hope your chromamas was cool too

uh
yeah thats it i got no philosophical bullshit to throw down this time just figured if it looks like my ass is sticking around i may as well poke my head out

[[Just be glad he's not trying to start stress-reaction rap battles.]]

Comments

[hagrides]

I am indeed still around. And I have someone to introduce you to, as well.

[itsknighttime]

someone to introduce me to?
you sure you wanna introduce me to anyone
thats a lot of social pressure on you and totally not me

[hagrides]

I promise you, they are very easy to please. My child likes anyone who gives them pets and lets them nap on them.

[itsknighttime]

oh holy fuck no way
i mean not the nap thing thats cool until the drool
man that must be a fucking weight off your shoulders
i mean damn weight
wait
what swears are kid friendly?
damn is kid friendly
its basically just appropriating beaver houses
might piss off a canadian or two maybe
or beavers
or perverts

ok im not good with kids full disclosure
i guess we were all kids at one point most of us
how do i even meet a kid?
do i bring pillow offerings for these naps?
im guessing shuriken arent a first step for everyone
yeah okay pillows

[hagrides]

Please do not suggest they nap on shruiken.

I would appreciate the swearing being kept to a minimum, but I understand that this does not come easily to you. They are not yet capable of proper speech, so they will not be repeating any of your words just yet.

[itsknighttime]

no i meant for like a gift like in general
ill get pillows it sounds like something babies like
karkat likes them so babies definitely like them
pillows not shuriken for the record unless you think theyd like that more because i can find some bitchin baby shuriken
that was one of my first too

yeah of course man
i will be mother fucking teresa but without the swear in there and the cultural reference i dont know how many people will actually get
ah shit i could teach them how to rap but like early will smith so its all kinds of kid friendly

[hagrides]

If you intend to provide a gift, I suggest that it not be flammable.

The two of you rapping together would be adorable, I must admit.

[itsknighttime]

yeah totally
metal has a melting point though so maybe not that
i almost asked why then i realized you spit actual sick fires not just hot mixtapes

hell yeah we can find them a cool rapper name like
lil flamey
nah maybe not that
well figure it out
theyll go platinum first week

how small are they? like real small?

[hagrides]

Small enough to sit comfortably on top of your head.

[itsknighttime]

is that like a good idea im pretty tall
i guess if they dont decide to fall faster than the speed of light i got this but
maybe we could just start with being in the same room
i dont think kids like me

[[Dave has no clue if kids like him. More like he's worried if he goes too close he's going to breathe and end up hurting them.]]

[hagrides]

They have wings and know how to use them. Falling will not be an issue.

Why not meet them before you decide whether they will like you or not?

[itsknighttime]

holy fuck
they have wings?
thats cool as hell
i wish i had wings when i was a kid it wouldve saved a lot of falling

[[Thank God, that's one thing off the list of things to worry about.]]

ok i guess thats more logical than what i said
which was at least valid even if its missing logic
shit man
im so god damn stoked you got your kid here

[hagrides]

[Having wings is definitely better than not having wings in every way, can confirm.]

As am I. Having them by my side again is a tremendous relief. And they are enjoying meeting new people here, as strange as humans are to them.

[itsknighttime]

[[One day Dave is going to have to go flying with them just to flex on all the non godtier/non bugs. Plus it's just faster.]]

i dont blame the lil dude
im a grown ass human and theyre strange as shit to me too
speakin of family
everyone still here?

[hagrides]

The Knight and the Hollow Knight are both still here. Have you met their half-sister, Hornet?

[itsknighttime]

ay my boys
i wish yall were home enjoyin cool bug world but im selfishly glad too
nah
ive heard the name but i aint met her
no lie though someone named her a badass name
no ones gonna fuck with someone named hornet

[hagrides]

It is an excellent name, one that fits her well. You should tell her so yourself - she has also arrived here.

[itsknighttime]

[[Oh no. He's not sure which is worse, talking to a girl or trying to convince himself he can't sneeze and kill a baby by accident.]]

noted my dude
ill just be careful where i aim my charm
is she like actually a hornet?
should i bring up topics of paper and their various uses in regurgitation real estate?

[hagrides]

[Baby is powerful. Girls are also powerful.]

I doubt she would find such interesting even if she were a hornet - but she is in fact a spider.

[itsknighttime]

[[The best team comp, the worst meta to face ever. Babies and girls.]]

oh okay
fuck
good thing im not arachnophobic
aight ill open up with a joke
ill roll up in those dms like

yo what up
what do you get when you cross a spider and corn
and if she answers cobwebs then were meant to be

[hagrides]

I can tell you immediately that you were not meant to be.

[Hornet has probably not told a joke in her life.]

[itsknighttime]

fuck shes broke my heart and i havent even met her
so youre saying im against a challenge
because im up for a challenge
what kindve things does she like?

[[It's okay, neither has Dave but he thinks they're funny.]]

[hagrides]

Hornet is a serious woman who is unfamiliar with the concept of a vacation and has spent most of her life as steward to a decaying kingdom. I'm uncertain if she herself could tell you her interests and hobbies.

Puns are not on the list, however.

[itsknighttime]

what im hearing you say is
dave she needs to let her silk down and go partying
i got you
dont worry man i will take care of this shit hands down

see women say that but they love them

[[They do not.]]

[hagrides]

Best of luck to you. Do remember that she is a capable combatant, if she seems to be growing irritated with the puns.