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[coasts]

[ Hello, chicks and dicks of Lunatia. It's your favourite rappers gracing you with their presence today. Two of Mad Trigger Crew's members are now on the screen. The thin, white-haired idiot is wearing a pair of sunglasses and he pulls them down by an inch to show his red eyes to the camera. ]

Hey. Is your house a mess? Do you have a ton of rotten food in your fridge? Do you have weeds in your backyard? Are you a slob?

'cause if you said yes to at least one of those things, you gotta click the link below. MTC's gonna change your life.

[ The video linked begins with an intensely dropped beat, a dramatic scene in an alley. Two shirtless people running for their lives, scrambling through the rain like they’ve just fled a crime scene just as the Moon Knights showed up. The redhead is clearly military, a couple of scars on his back from bullet wounds. The man in front has white hair and a large yakuza tattoo on his back. There is rapping as this scene unfolds. ]

Get ready for a showdown,
Ain't no hoedown,
Grass is so brown,
Here to crackdown!

ON LAWNS!

[ As they bust out of the alley and into the open, it’s into a wild field of tall grass. In the middle of it, a large driveable lawn mower. The two of them hop on, the matching leather jackets they’re wearing flaring up as they do. As the camera moves to pan across their faces, it’s Samatoki and Riou, looking fiercely determined. They start racing off on the lawn mower. It looks like it’s in slow motion to accomodate for the fact that lawnmowers in reality aren’t very fast for this high speed chase. ]

MTC just won't let down,
Garden parties in tea gowns,
Either uptown or downtown,
Weeds are going like ghost towns--

YOUR LAWNS!

[ The camera view changes to the front of the lawnmower, coming toward the camera. As Moon Knight agents run through the alley behind them, suddenly both of the buildings forming the alley blow up in a MASSIVE special effects explosion as Riou and Samatoki put on sunglasses. Neither of them look back. ]

Get ready for the takedown,
From sunrise 'til sundown,
Weeds, leaves, grass, and tree crowns,
No more gardening breakdowns!

CLEAN LAWNS!

[ Riou takes out a power drill behind Samatoki on the lawn mower. He nods and turns the power drill on, whirring it a few times and then speaking: ]

We do repairs and housework, too.

[ The screen explodes then into a blue logo with a skull and guns... for Mad Trigger Cutters. And the commercial ends. ]

Comments

[ssrs]

[ he glances at the face peeking through the door -- then down, at the stacked dogs. damn... if this ain't the cutest shit ever. itaru doesn't mind pets -- he's never had one on his own, not really, but he sure did get along with the theater company parrot... if you count bribing it with food to bring him protein bars as 'getting along.'

that said, he appreciates the concern. if he was allergic, or something, this would be bad. ]

I'm fine, dogs are cool. They look cute. [ they don't seem aggressive, either, or too big, so it's all good. ]

[grylls]

[ Riou opens the door once the dogs have permission. They don't jump all over Itaru immediately, thankfully. They are well-trained and know not to go diving out of the door. In fact, Riou whispers a "Sit" at them and they immediately sit side-by-side right next to the entrance. Riou himself is wearing a plain white t-shirt and a pair of camo pants, all very precisely-fit, behind a plain white apron. He moves out of the way of the door as soon as it's open. ]

This is Smith and Wesson.

[ Yes, his dogs are named after guns despite being small and adorable. As soon as Itaru steps into the room, they'll be following behind him trying to get a sniff of either foot. ]

I'm about to start. You can sit at the bar if you want to watch or on the couch if you don't.

[ He doesn't know what Itaru would want to do on the couch though. Maybe rest? But it's an option. The bar he's referring to looks kind of like this. The pass-through to the kitchen has been turned into kind of a bar-seating area to give him more room in the kitchen, with which he's added more counterspace and an extra sink for prepping food separate from the wash sink. ]

I found sweet acorn squash. They make a sweet spice muffin.

[ Since Itaru's paying he wants to make sure that's okay first!! If not he'll figure it out. He looks kind of excited though. No one's ever paid him to cook before.. ]

[ssrs]

[ now that they're face-to-face, itaru notices just how tall the other is -- he has to tip his head up to look at him properly, which isn't something that happens very often. from the look of it, he's pretty jacked, too -- itaru's gaze falls to his arms, then to his chest, and it makes the contrast of the apron that much more stark. ... well, he should probably stop checking the host out and just get settled first, though.

so he enters, maneuvering so that he doesn't step on either dog, and places the bag with the beer on the countertop. ]

Smith. Wesson. [ he repeats, mostly to memorize it -- then points to himself, remembering that... oh yeah, they totally skipped introductions. ] I'm Itaru, by the way. Chigasaki Itaru. Nice to meet you, and stuff.

[ a little sluggish, he takes a seat by the bar, glancing around. well, it's homely; it's also easy to tell that this guy likes cooking, even if he'd never guess from like, meeting him out on the street or something. ]

You... found it. Outside? [ no, inside. he's just a little surprised, because... he thought riou wanted to buy the ingredients himself, not literally forage them. ] Well, that's fine by me. I'll trust your cooking skills. [ since he has none...

in the meantime, he'll lean down to prod at the dogs, watching them try to catch his finger. ]

You always just go out and find food? That's new.

[grylls]

Mm. I'm a survivalist.

[ He isn't going to deny or hide that at all. It would be impossible to. He only lives indoors because Samatoki told him to and he does as he's told, provided he views that person as an authority. The two people who currently hold that position are Samatoki and Jyuto, and no one else. ]

My name is Riou Mason Busujima. Riou or Mason or Crazy M are all okay to call me.

[ He'll respond to any of them. No one calls him Busujima though, that would be weird to him. The dogs seem happy playing with Itaru's fingers, though Smith (the more vocal of the two) does let out a periodic bark at his fingers as he tries to catch them. It's a playful one, though. Riou heads into the kitchen and starts weighing out ingredients. Itaru may notice that everything is in mason jars-- not because of his name, but because most of the things in here he either gathered or processed himself. There's white board marker on the labels on the side of them, so Itaru can probably see that he's putting acorn flour in first. ]

[ssrs]

Survivalist...

[ well, he can guess what that means from the name itself: this guy likes making his life harder for himself for fun. and, you know, that's cool, even if itaru will never understand it. ]

... huh? What's Crazy M supposed to stand for? [ m like... masochist??? do-m????

giving both of the dogs a small pat on the head, he straightens up to look at what riou's doing properly, admittedly pretty curious how... you're supposed to bake with stuff you found outside. riou claims it's good, but who knows? at least his stomach is pretty resistant, from the amount of garbage food and soda he consumes daily. ]

So uh... where'd you learn all that? Foraging and stuff.

[grylls]

Mason. I'm half-American, so I have a middle name.

[ Even though they don't normally do that in Japan, so he's used to having to explain it... ]

Crazy M is my MC name. You don't need to call me that in private.

[ But he would respond to it if Itaru wanted to... As he talks, he starts chopping up the acorn squash into small pieces and putting them on a tray to roast them. You have to roast them before you blend them to not only get the best flavor, but also to make them soft enough to blend up together for the muffins... ]

I was in the Japanese Navy's special ops. At times, we had to find our own provisions or we would've gone without food.

[ssrs]

Ah, yeah, that makes more sense.

[ than crazy masochist... crazy maso... crazy mason... ???? why is he crazy? should itaru ask? there's some sort of an amusing discrepancy here, because when he looks at riou, the other looks perfectly stoic and about as un-crazy as you'd imagine.

well, maybe he'll save that question for a more appropriate time. ]

Don't worry, I prefer to keep things simple. Riou -- [ he hesitates. is the other older? younger? should he skip honorifics? ... ah, whatever. ] -- is just fine. I'm guessing you make music, then, huh? Cool.

[ he doesn't see any equipment around, but maybe this is just... out-of-lunatia kind of a deal. whatever it is, itaru doesn't pry, instead watching riou work. he'd expected a big guy like him to be a little clumsier with these things -- he seems to know exactly what he's doing, though, at the level where he's pretty impressed. ]

... hmm. Even so, it must be hard to forage in the middle of the city, no? Wouldn't it be easier to just buy some food? ... unless you're low on cash.

[grylls]

That was Samatoki and I rapping in the commercial.

[ Though usually the lyrics are (somewhat) less ridiculous. But yes, make music. As for equipment, his is on his waist- though it certainly looks like a military walkie talkie. It's probably questionable in itself since there's no one else with a satellite walkie for him to talk to, but that summons ridiculous speakers and all kinds of stuff. ]

Along with Jyuto, we are Mad Trigger Crew.

[ He doesn't look at Itaru while he's working. Riou doesn't want to cut off a finger, after all. He's ridiculously strong, but it's all 100% normal human strength. If he cuts or burns himself, he'll bleed and it'll ruin the ingredients. ]

I make chroma and demi-chroma both because that's the mission set out for the moonblessed by this world's government, but I don't spend any because I do everything myself.

[ In other words, he's loaded. ] The city makes travel times farther to get to the wilderness, but not impossible because of the technology to travel. It would be better if I had a car though.

[ssrs]

Right. Sama-chan mentioned something about having a crew, but honestly, I thought you guys were gangsters, not rappers.

[ who rap about... lawns... of all things... honestly, he's not sure what to think about the group anymore. it's kinda ridiculous, but then he remembers one of his theater troupes has a yakuza member in it, too, so, you know what? he guesses anything goes nowadays. ]

Ah.

[ well, for itaru, he's pretty new around here, so -- he hasn't really found a reliable way to make chroma just yet. there's the mmo tournaments, which he plans on participating in, but that'll take a while to get to anything profitable, and in the meantime... well. he's not that great with people, despite the pretenses he puts up; or rather, he doesn't like dealing with people if he doesn't have to.

so making chroma the classic way isn't gonna be that easy, either.

in other words... it'd make sense to just hang around the rich guy, right? he talks about it so casually... ]

If you're loaded, you should get a car. Bet that's easier. [ he nods, leaning on the counter to peek at the other's hands. ] Do you work, or just forage? Making time for both seems kinda annoying.

[grylls]

Samatoki is yakuza, but Jyuto is a police officer and I am a soldier.

[ ..Former. Details. Does that somehow make the lawn rapping any less silly? Probably not. ]

I mow lawns. I hunt, too. Larger animals are too much for one person, so I'll usually butcher them and sell the rest. It's important to save money for emergencies.

[ He's a survivor but if he breaks his arm he's still going to need to see a doctor, and that costs money, you know? And Samatoki gets arrested sometimes and if he needs him immediately he wants to be able to pay bail and so on.. Riou wants to be able to have money to spend whenever he needs it, but he doesn't want to need it 99.9% of the time. ]

[ssrs]

A Yakuza, a police officer and a soldier. What a ragtag bunch.

[ he snorts, a little amused. well, can't say anything about it, really -- there's plenty of strange combinations back at mankai, too, including a yakuza. how is it that a yakuza and a policeman get along, though? maybe he's some sort of a dirty cop, or something...

well. he can inquire about the ins and outs later. ]

Does mowing lawns even pay well... ? [ if this is anything like back on earth, it shouldn't. but, well, can't say anything about hunting, since he doesn't know jack shit about how much the meat sells for.

still, if riou saves up diligently, itaru guesses he'd eventually amass a good sum. ]

Ah, I forgot you guys take your shirts off for extra. I suppose that must be worth a good amount, huh?

[grylls]

I make more money in tips than I charge.

[ In case Itaru didn't notice, he's paying him for muffins and treating him to a warm couch, getting served, conversation, if he asks for anything he'll give it to him, he can ask him to take off his shirt.. and Riou helps a lot of rich old ladies too so he gets really good tips. 'u' ]

But since I don't have any bills or expenditures, it all goes into savings and investments.