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[coasts]

[ Hello, chicks and dicks of Lunatia. It's your favourite rappers gracing you with their presence today. Two of Mad Trigger Crew's members are now on the screen. The thin, white-haired idiot is wearing a pair of sunglasses and he pulls them down by an inch to show his red eyes to the camera. ]

Hey. Is your house a mess? Do you have a ton of rotten food in your fridge? Do you have weeds in your backyard? Are you a slob?

'cause if you said yes to at least one of those things, you gotta click the link below. MTC's gonna change your life.

[ The video linked begins with an intensely dropped beat, a dramatic scene in an alley. Two shirtless people running for their lives, scrambling through the rain like they’ve just fled a crime scene just as the Moon Knights showed up. The redhead is clearly military, a couple of scars on his back from bullet wounds. The man in front has white hair and a large yakuza tattoo on his back. There is rapping as this scene unfolds. ]

Get ready for a showdown,
Ain't no hoedown,
Grass is so brown,
Here to crackdown!

ON LAWNS!

[ As they bust out of the alley and into the open, it’s into a wild field of tall grass. In the middle of it, a large driveable lawn mower. The two of them hop on, the matching leather jackets they’re wearing flaring up as they do. As the camera moves to pan across their faces, it’s Samatoki and Riou, looking fiercely determined. They start racing off on the lawn mower. It looks like it’s in slow motion to accomodate for the fact that lawnmowers in reality aren’t very fast for this high speed chase. ]

MTC just won't let down,
Garden parties in tea gowns,
Either uptown or downtown,
Weeds are going like ghost towns--

YOUR LAWNS!

[ The camera view changes to the front of the lawnmower, coming toward the camera. As Moon Knight agents run through the alley behind them, suddenly both of the buildings forming the alley blow up in a MASSIVE special effects explosion as Riou and Samatoki put on sunglasses. Neither of them look back. ]

Get ready for the takedown,
From sunrise 'til sundown,
Weeds, leaves, grass, and tree crowns,
No more gardening breakdowns!

CLEAN LAWNS!

[ Riou takes out a power drill behind Samatoki on the lawn mower. He nods and turns the power drill on, whirring it a few times and then speaking: ]

We do repairs and housework, too.

[ The screen explodes then into a blue logo with a skull and guns... for Mad Trigger Cutters. And the commercial ends. ]

Comments

[inthebuilding]

..........................
[ What did he just watch. And who filmed this, because it certainly wasn't Jyuto?! ]

[grylls]

Do you like it, Jyuto?

[ please approve of your crewmates, they worked hard on this 'u' ]

[coasts]

You look like you got somethin' to say.

[ Does he have to punch you, Jyuto ]

[hoasen]

Al...alright.

[??!??!?!?!?!?!?!]

[coasts]

We'll take off our shirts for a price!

[grylls]

Mm.

[ An affirmative nod. As if to confirm her 'alright.' ]

video;

[dissimilates]

[ .................

wow, how pissed is jyuto going to be when he sees this ]

So were you ultimately arrested by the Moon Knights for this video?

video;

[grylls]

The explosions are just special effects.

[ They didn't actually blow up any buildings!! They aren't in trouble ;o; ]

[coasts]

As if! Like those guys can arrest me again!

[ He's gonna get arrested later on... he just jinxed himself. ]

[diamondfusion]

You're really branching out.

[He's DYING laughing on the inside.]

[coasts]

It was Riou's idea. He does this all the time and he invited me to join him.

[kingfuckboy]

That was very... creative.

[ He's trying not to roast you guys, but... ]

Did you come up with all on your own?

[ or is there someone else to blame? ]

[coasts]

It's fuckin' badass is what it is!

[ You don't have to pretend, Jj... it was hardcore. ]

And hell yeah, we did. Just 'cause we're gonna start a business doesn't mean we gotta wear neckties and look like we got a stick up our asses.

[zazen]

[WHAT CAN HE EVEN HAVE TO SAY TO THIS RIGHT NOW?]

I am incredibly impressed by your.....work ethic?

[Yeah sure we are going to go with that.]

[grylls]

Thank you. I've been doing this for some time. Samatoki thought it would help if we advertised. We will take off our shirts during the service for an additional fee.

[doreimi]

...Wait, so this is an ad for lawn care services?

[ w h a t ]

[grylls]

Yes.

We will also remove our shirts during the service for an additional fee.

Video

[freshtilapia]

Flashy... impressive... never seen anything like it! [ Have some enthusiastic merfolk clapping. ]

Well, I suppose you have a potential customer now. To be honest, my home... isn't the neatest of places.

video

[grylls]

We can help. Do you want to set-up a one-time service or do you want us to come on a schedule?

[ringlette]

My, Samatoki, that was a real fantastique performance! I shall tip my [ big ] hat off to you and your companion!

[ Anything can make Marie impressed so don't rely on her for standards... ]

[grylls]

Thank you.

[ Just from the companion here! 'u' ] I'm Riou.

[ So she knows in case she ever gets what his name is. It's important to know. ]

video

[ssrs]

Do you guys butter people's muffins, too?

[ he's here to be a mean girl ]

video

[grylls]

We charge by the hour. That would be an expensive muffin. I can cook, however, and it will take less than an hour to do so.

[ He'll cook if Itaru wants him to. That seems more worthwhile than buttering a muffin?? Riou is too honest to charge someone for buttering a muffin. ]

[Text; un: turntechGodhead]

[itsknighttime]

[[Is this what love feels like? Maybe. Probably not. Most definitely not but that is a god damn rap. Not only is it a fucking rap its fire and not only is it fire but it's being done by someone who's got the same damn eyes as him and he hasn't met anyone else ever who's got the colour and not been a demon or something dumb.

Now if only his head wasn't exploding like the blue logo over someone rapping a sick rhyme.]]

you cant tell because im typing but im also clapping
dont ask how im doing both just accept that im doing fucking both
i dont need any of that other shit i just need some more fireass mixtape

[grylls]

Mad Trigger Crew recently reunited here.
We haven't had a chance to re-record our songs here, but I have a birdbox somewhere.

[ So he should be able to play them for him if he wants. ]

« video » un: foxlike

[foxtouched]

[ She's stunned actually. Perhaps a little more happier, too, because this was A Thing, but at the same time... it's Samatoki and Riou. She ought to support it. And they look so handsome, too. ]

You showed those knights. And were, Ah. "Very cool!"

[ She's trying...! ]

Congratulations on your new business?

[coasts]

[ THEY... THEY DON'T HAVE A LICENSE... They are going to get arrested. ]

Thanks! This is just for fun, but I guess it's a business since we're gonna make money outta it!

[steelo]

[ what the actual fuck should he be laughing at them or feeling vaguely disrespected get your own odd jobs or

feel anything besides "what the actual fuck" ]

....So this is what you guys do in Yokohama?

[coasts]

[ GEH... why the fuck is Ichiro replying to this post??? Samatoki's mood is immediately soured by this. ]

What we do's none of your business! [ He's not yakuza here... :( He needs money too, Ichiro. ] Don't be jealous 'cause your crew ain't here!

[ NEENER NEENER ICHIRO HAS A BUTT FACE ]

[whosaysdajare]

Pfff-ahahaha!!

That was amazing, I'd seriously play it in one of my shows!
[ Take that as a compliment or don't. He's definitely, absolutely laughing his guts inside out. ]

[grylls]

Thank you.

[ Riou takes it as a compliment. He seems pleased with it. Laughing is a good response, he thinks. ]

text | username: absterge

[downswing]

( his eyes and ears were not made for this. )




You are... servitors?

[grylls]

No.
We're rappers.
Though I did serve in the Navy previously, though that's not the same sense of service.

[doctorize]

What.

[... No seriously, what did we just watch.]

[grylls]

[ ???

he's not sure what this person is asking. ]

We can play it again, if you missed something.

[burnt_offering]

[Well, someone liked it. Ace applauds, that was big and flashy and fun.]

You're gonna get some serious business off of that.

[coasts]

'course we are! I'm the brains and Riou's the brawn, after all. This project is lit!

[ HIRE THEM ]

text; un: percival

[vassalize]

[ He does legitimately need their grass trimmed properly, but he has his reservations after watching. ]

If I hire you for your services, do I have to pay extra for the two of you not to sing?

[grylls]

[ Wow that's rude. They're really good at rapping! ]

Rap is battle. If I am challenged, I will do so regardless of your preference. As a soldier, I didn't fight in a war to have my speech limited.

[ His half-American ass will defend his right to free speech. ]