text | anonymous

[penpoint]

I have a question. Consider it a bit of a survey or questionnaire. I'm curious. I want to remain anonymous, so that people feel like they can safely remain anonymous, as well.

What does love mean to you here? What did it mean to you at home? Is it different for both?

Relationships are seemingly more complicated here than they would be at most of our homes. I was wondering if others felt the same.

How are you managing it here in a place where it does seem more complicated? Are you doing the same things you would have done if you were at home?

Thank you for your time.

Comments

[penpoint]

I'm well past embracing it, and into dealing with it. Besides, I'm not going to turn down pizza even if I didn't order it.

[wearingguess]

I disagree that "dealing" with it is well past "embracing" it! That still makes it sound as though you are handling it in a begrudging manner. You need to acknowledge how much better your world is because the person you love is a part of it. You ought to disavow your foolish past self who would have wished to avoid growing to love someone and admit that your reluctance was a result of tragic ignorance! I recommend that you go find the person you love right now and thank them from the bottom of your heart for showing you how much more there is to a life with pizza in it!

[penpoint]

I disagree that it is begrudging, and if I had felt it appropriate, this already would have happened. But it isn't right now, and who knows when it will be.

[wearingguess]

Then it seems we must disagree to agree on that point.


Oh
So then
They don't know that you love them?

[penpoint]

No. They don't. They may not ever.

[wearingguess]

Why not? Are you under some kind of curse that prevents you from revealing your true feelings?

[penpoint]

What? No. I don't think such a thing exists where I'm from.

[wearingguess]

Well, then? What is the problem?

[penpoint]

[ he feels pretty called out, thanks titus ]

This place is the problem.

[wearingguess]

Really, if you don't want to answer me at all, you can say as much, but must you make me ask a new question on every little point?
To wit: in what respect is this place a problem?

[penpoint]

I'm not making you ask any questions. You could just as easily let it go.

I am not seeking advice for how to manage my own feelings, either. At no point was that suggested.

But everyone will leave here and we do not know what we will be stuck with after this.

[wearingguess]

Then we both agree that we are having this conversation because we want to!

Ah, you are really thinking ahead. But even still, both of you are here now, are you not? All the more reason to act quickly. [ it's literally impossible for this to go badly! titus would know—he promised his adopted sister he'd be with her forever even though he knew he probably only had another month to live, and all that happened was he had a breakdown (or two? three at MOST) and was on the verge of betraying his life's mission or whatever about it, and then he showed up here and got to avoid ever having to deal with any of that for an open-ended interval!! ...even though he knows it could end at any moment, and either way he still doesn't get to be with his sister, so his emotional instability is probably at least as bad as ever!!

in other words, it's foolproof. ]

[penpoint]

You're not the first person to tell me I should act.

[ stubborn assholes and all that... ]

[wearingguess]

Really? How many people would need to tell you that before you realized what you ought to do? Three maybe, or perhaps four or five?

[penpoint]

It doesn't matter how many do or don't if I don't intend on doing it at all. I'm going to do what I think is right.

[wearingguess]

[ boring... ]

Well, naturally.
But I still cannot understand why not saying anything seems "right." Wouldn't anyone would be happy to hear that they were loved?

[penpoint]

Maybe. Maybe not. Depending on who it came from. Maybe I don't value feeling that way towards me the same way that others do.

[wearingguess]

What do you mean? I cannot tell whether that means you are so accustomed to being loved that it doesn't even matter to you anymore, or if you have so little experience with it that you cannot figure out how it would make you feel...

[penpoint]

Neither. That I never much cared for how people thought or felt about me.

[wearingguess]

But you care how the person you love thinks and feels about you.
And you must care at least a little about how the rest of us do, or you wouldn't have bothered to post this anonymously.

[penpoint]

Sure, with them. Not with anyone else here, though.

I do appreciate people's honesty with anonymous people, though. It's worked before, so I opted to do it again.

[wearingguess]

Are people really more honest with those who are anonymous?? I wonder why!

[penpoint]

Yes, they are. Because much of they time, they're anonymous, as well. No judgment to be passed.

[wearingguess]

I shall take your word for it!
I wonder if you've even anonymously talked to the person you love, who was likewise anonymous?

[penpoint]

It's doubtful I did.