eleven 💕 anonymous text

[dereban]

hey.

so - sorry to be a little bit negative on anon, but, i kinda wanna talk for a bit. so, i've been in this world a really long time now! and something that i've noticed is that "things" tend to happen near the end of the month. it's like a pattern.

but's that's not what i want to talk about.

sometimes, people enjoy the things that happen during the end of the month.

sometimes, those things are bad.

for me? it's almost ALWAYS the latter. even for things that maybe most people would just brush off... they're 'trauma', for me. shit i had to deal with back home, that was forced on me. and it's stupidly ironic that some of these events tend to mirror the events that i've dealt with. personally. honestly, i don't even know if many people, if ANYONE can relate to me.

so i guess, the question i pose today is something a little more personal. go anon if you want, too.

but... how do you guys deal with it all? and more importantly: have events here mirrored things from your home worlds, too?

Comments

anon

[nojohnyouare]

[She almost doesn't respond. But she finds the anon button and hesitates for a long time before sending.]

Fighting enemies is fine. I just want to protect people. Though things like home

Once.

When that king said it was our fault. And some of the people believed him. Graffiti and throwing rocks, for being different. Supernatural. That's the only thing.

[dereban]

i'm not a fighter.

i was there for that. and i think that people were idiots, for being like that.

a lot of the supernatural things are things i've experienced back home. it's not fun, for me.

[nojohnyouare]

I've heard about them. Hauntings. Mind control. Like that.

Sorry. That your home had those too. I don't know how to deal with things that hurt me. But trying.

[An edit, after a minute:]

Don't repress it. It seems natural. But it never helps.

[dereban]

thankfully the mind control and hauntings weren't common back home.

but there's a lot of other things that did happen to me that mirrored the things back home. repressing things doesn't help anyone... sometimes.

[nojohnyouare]

Makes things worse. In my experience.

Do you have people who know what happened to you. Who can help you. It feels like burdening others, but... the only thing I can think of.

[dereban]

only a few people.

one person knows... sort of? but i've never told them the details.

[nojohnyouare]

Understandable. Hard to tell people things. Sorry.

I don't know how to deal either. I should know. Bad at it.

[dereban]

there's no need to apologize. even though those people do know, it's hard to talk to them. about this. because i feel like i'm a burden, i guess, if i do.

even if i should know better.

[nojohnyouare]

I think a lot of people can relate to that. Probably. But that might not make it easier.

Were their worlds difficult too?

[dereban]

most people are not from my world.

their world is vastly different from mine.

un: clearwater2000 -- she missed the anon button by accident 1/2

[nojohnyouare]

I've seen that too. People not afraid. Who know what they are and everything about the supernatural, because it's normal for them. For me, it's interesting. Nice. But if you were hurt by those things, it must be hard.

...and she goes back on anon, because that totally has a point now, except it doesn't.

[nojohnyouare]

Sorry. Not used to this.

[dereban]

it's fine; i'm not here to snitch or anything like that.

but... yeah. i have been hurt. but i'm also aware that i shouldn't judge people who DO have those abilities because i have been hurt. i have someone that i love that has abilities, too, after all.

i'm trying to get used to it.

[nojohnyouare]

[It's a long time before Mai replies. Still on anon, even if it's not really hiding anything. Just thinking.

Liar. Unnatural. Fraud. Occult mother and daughter. Troublemaker. It's all your fault. Monster.

I'm sure you'll like that power one day.]

It's natural to be afraid. But you're doing more than a lot of people would. In a world most people think is normal, they'd see anything that looked occult to be wrong and reject it, even if it hadn't hurt them. Because it didn't fit what they thought the world should be.

Your effort is a lot. I think.

[dereban]

yeah.

i want to keep pushing though because people are... more than their abilities.

[nojohnyouare]

They're important to you. They'll know you're doing your best. I hope, but I think so.

[dereban]

i think if they didn't...

i'd be sad :(

[nojohnyouare]

I understand. Hard to believe that. But the people here are nice.

[dereban]

i think that most people here are nice as well so that's a plus

[nojohnyouare]

Maybe it's because we need to be close here. That people open up.

[dereban]

i think that people will open up to others in spite of "needing to be close" if they like someone.

[nojohnyouare]

That's true. But they're making those connections in the first place.

Maybe I'm not the person to talk about how people act.

[dereban]

connections are generally something you have to make to survive in general.

'no man is an island'.

even more so when you're dropped in a new world.

[nojohnyouare]

I know. Just... Easier. Somehow.

[dereban]

i guess