003 | ( VIDEO + JOINT POST. ) | JUNE 6th

[herocomplex]

_{[ With the whole dragon fiasco interrupting America's flow of life here on this planet, he's a little more than eager to make a big announcement. He's worked hard to open up a business, and now it's time for him to broadcast it! The feed clicks on and shows both America & Klaus in their respectable Cordis forms; America with his foxy ears and tail and Klaus is looking a little more.. dragon-y than usual. They are, however, wearing matching suits. Perhaps you’ve seen the vague advertisements pasted everywhere-- possibly on your car, house, etc, or maybe it’s word of mouth, but the big night has finally come. They're showing the feed from Crystal Beach with a restaurant in the background. ]}

Hey you guys!! Hahahaha! Listen up here, I've got some big news to report, you won't want to miss it! Me and my buddy are proud to show you _{[ their financial love child ]} our business we are opening up!

_{[ America elbows Klaus in the ribs before whispering: go on, you can say it! ]}

Say -- oh, fuck! Right, yeah.

<sub>[ Klaus had, unfortunately, been focused mostly on making sure he didn’t squirm too much in the suit he was currently wearing -- its itchy on his newfound scales, all right, and even with his slightly more regal posture and temperament, he can’t cover up the fact that he has no idea what to do.

He clears his throat and straightens the lapels on his jacket and then motions to both sides expansively with both arms. It’s very Vanna White. ]</sub>

Presenting...McDenny’s! Do you love diner food, but hate the fact that people get all weird about the heavy petting you get into after you finish your meal? Well, here at McDenny’s, we’ve got your back.

_{[ Klaus’s eyes dart back over to America and he raises his eyebrows, flashing a grin that’s only slightly tense. Does he … does he have anything to add? ]}

Hahaha, perfect! You did great! I knew you would!

_{[ He said that way too loud. ]}

We sell American cuisine and offer a snuggle lounge upstairs open 7 pm - 3 am, but you can come by the diner anytime, it’s 24/7! We’re also looking for new hires.. and who knows, we may or may not even be giving away free food today, so come by and see us right away and check it out! We're right on the Crystal Beach, you can't miss it!

_{[ With that, they both wave and sign off.
ooc: America is in blue, Klaus is in purple.. get responses from us both or just one of us. Check out his business here! ]}

Comments

[herocomplex]

hahahaa okaaaay wow
alright

how about

not you

[action - short form? lmao]

[garb4ge]

[Klaus just looks over at him like 'why not him, exactly?']

( ACTION. )

[herocomplex]

_{[ He's been around Klaus to know what he's trying to ask wthout asking, and so: ]}

Becaaaaauuuuse.

_{[ God, his voice is so whiny. It looks like he's about to throw a fit. ]}

He's perfect.
And I hate that.

_{[ Something he probably wouldn't outwardly admit so easily to anyone else. ]}

[garb4ge]

[And he's been around Alfred long enough to figure out why that might bother him.

Klaus lets out a 'harrumph' and shrugs his shoulders.]

Sounds boring. Milquetoast, even.

[herocomplex]

Yeah. I wouldn't even associate him with something as good as toast, though.
_{[ He has no idea what "milquetoast" means, sorry. ]}

Perfect hair. Perfect body. The worst part? He has a perfect personality too. Man. I hate it when people have both. I think him and Vietnam are something too, I don't know. It's whatever. His loss he can't work here.

[garb4ge]

[Even Klaus is sort of muddy on the meaning of the term, so it's fine.

He isn't going to lie, it's hard to find a crack in the logic Alfred's got, but...]

Nobody's perfect. People who put that kind of front up? They've always got the nastiest shit to hide.

[Sorry, stranger, he's throwing you under the bus 200% here.]

[herocomplex]

You think so?

_{[ America, you strive to put up that front. Which is why he's totally playing oblivious. ]}

[garb4ge]

Oh, definitely.

Why do you think so many priests get away with being kiddy-diddlers for so long?

[Klaus ... please.]

Fronts.

[herocomplex]

Hmm. Yeah. So, we totally gotta keep him out.. for our safety.
Good call.

_{[ nods firmly like he knows exactly what he's talking about. ]}

[garb4ge]

Exactly. Especially with how strict Adra is about things, I'm sure they'd butt heads.

[This is just a blatant lie.]

[herocomplex]

I think Adra butts heads with everyone.. it like comes with the whole lived-thousands-of-years-elf package.

_{[ A slow and steady sip from his drink as he looks over at the other man. ]}

But he makes good food. I just think he needs to get laid. Somehow. We should find him a date. I mean, it would eliminate any hostile work environment he might bring in, so it would benefit the business.

[garb4ge]

[Klaus can't help the laugh when Alfred says that Adra needs to get laid.

To be fair, he is definitely not wrong -- now seems like it might be the wrong time to tell Alfred he'd already tried to bark up that tree, though.]

I think he could date my brother, honestly. He seems like he'd be into bookish nerds.

[herocomplex]

Guess you have no other choice than to set them up on a blind date, hahahaha!

_{[ big ole shrug.. ]}

I've never met your brother before. I bet he's cute just like you. ♡

[loewenbien]

Aw why not?

I can cook! and i'm a fast learner too!

[herocomplex]

and what kind of experience do u even have for something like this??? i only hire the best

_{[ America, you're hiring people with no experience into management. ]}

[loewenbien]

oh lots!! been doing it since I was a kid, even. I used to help my grandma make meals for all the other grandmas and grandpas in the village!

And back in Duplicity, I was sous chef at PECS! Also at Bistro Drachenritter back home. All the Dragon Knights helped save it from going out of business and we made a lot of yummy things for the menu!

That's a Chateaubrilliant Roast with Fritters! It was so popular too! I can make that, and lots of other things too!

[herocomplex]

_{[ Ugggghhh. Uggggggh. He's so MAD, cause this looks so nice and legit and yeah, out of all of them besides maybe Adra and Italy, he's got experience. Fuck. ]}

and all of what you've said.. that's supposed to impress me?

[loewenbien]

... I can make burgers too if you'd rather have that...

but I just wanna help. You're Viety's friend and any friend of hers is a friend of mine! She wouldn't like you so much if you weren't a good person! And I totally think you're fun, too! So I wanna give you lots of help for your place! It's hard to do everything your own, right?

[herocomplex]

oh yeaaaahhh
ofc u want to help "viety's" friend
yeah i get it
tryna score brownie points
yeah sure

ok look
mister
i'm-perfect-at-everything

if u wanna help so badly
why don't u come by
huh
why don't u come by and do some important duties for me
ok?

we can talk more in person
ur hired

[loewenbien]

[ Best part is, he totally thinks that America is well within his rights to be tough about his establishment! It ensures quality! And he's got to work hard, so- ]

Huh?

REALLY?!!

I'LL DO IT THEN THANKS SO MUCH AMERICA!!

I'LL BE RIGHT OVER YOU'RE ABSOLUTELY THE BEST!!!

[herocomplex]

better get here asap then
im timing u

[loewenbien]

[ Guess who's waving in the window the next minute because he was totally in the area!! ]

Hey America! You're looking good in there!

[herocomplex]

_{[ softly, and to himself: ]}

Oh God.

_{[ He pipes up, heading over to the door and opening it for Vane. ]}

Yeah, so. You're a little late, dude. That's not a very good impression on your first day, is it?

[loewenbien]

Really? I didn't know I was late! I was right outside, too!!


[ Guess what, America, he's so chill he's an ice cream. But he smiles brightly. ]

So let's not waste any time! What do you want me doing? If you've got a chef already, I can help and make things easier for them!

[ I mean, it's why he's here. ]

[herocomplex]

No, no.. no.

_{[ He escorts Vane inside, placing his hand on his shoulder. It's all faux and put on, so his lips finally pull into what appears to be a sincere smile. ]}

Like I said, Bane. _{[ It's Vane. ]}

The duties I have for you are so important. Actually, it's a role that nobody in this establishment can _{or rather want to} fulfill, so I guess it's up to you, buddy. Think you can handle it with that sunshiney attitude and perfect, muscular, pristine body of yours that I'm not jealous of at all?

_{[ What does his body have to do with anything? Before Vane can respond: ]}

Great! I'm entrusting you. You're going to be the most important person on staff, okay?