text, un: bellabelle

[doreimi]

You know...at one point I would've made a post like this anonymously. Not because I'm ashamed or anything, exactly, but because sometimes you just want to talk about things without your name attached, you know? So that it's not really about you, just about the advice you're looking for. Or because you don't want people to look at you differently after they hear about it.

I guess it's because it's been so hot lately that it got me thinking about it. And also because of Cordis, a little. Sometimes I get wings for Cordis, and then all of a sudden my wardrobe gets pretty limited when it comes to...that. But anyway.

Really what I wanted to ask is —

For people who have scars, how do you think about them? Like are they a part of your identity now, or do they still bother you? Do they feel wrong when you look at them? And — if you are okay with them, did you do something to make yourself more okay with them? Or are you just kind of...never going to be okay with them, no matter what?

I have some. I think they're ugly, and hard to look at, and I try to keep them covered up so that they won't bother people who might see them. I guess really what I'm wondering is whether that's a feeling that's ever likely to change.

It's just something that's been on my mind more and more lately, is all.

Comments

[nojohnyouare]

Easily covered. But people might ask if they saw. They haven't... Maybe they think it's personal business.

You said you cover yours. Difficult?

[doreimi]

No, not really, I guess. It's only during Cordis that it gets kind of tough.

[nojohnyouare]

I see.

Sorry. That I don't have good advice. But your friends likely won't mind. The people here are nice. Most of them.

[doreimi]

I don't think they'll be mean to me about it or anything, if that's what you mean. But just because they aren't mean about it doesn't mean they won't mind.

[nojohnyouare]

Maybe. People are difficult.

Trying to like something you think is wrong with you. I have that problem. And sometimes others agree. Even here.

["I can't say I like hearing it. I'm not a huge fan of that sort of thing, after what happened to me in the past."]

But not always.

["Your will can affect reality. You have... such a power."]

Have you seen anyone else with scars like that? Maybe they might understand.

[doreimi]

Not like mine, exactly. Some of my friends have something similar, but...not like mine.

[nojohnyouare]

I see. Maybe that's common here, too. It sounds like your friends will understand. But that's hard to believe in when someone tells you.

[doreimi]

Yeah, I think so, too. Easier said than done, and all that.

[nojohnyouare]

Still. I hope it goes well. Whatever you decide to do.