text. @Blade

[prizeneck]

currently looking for someone familiar with weaponry and comms tech
namely monomolecular films or something similar
and a connection from this communication system to a pair of sunglasses which may already have the interface installed

[What. babby's first network post and no hi? no thanks? sheesh.

Also, be aware that he's using voice-to-text and our lovely Siri may fuck it up because we all know how dictation tech goes.]

Comments

[prizeneck]

[This is so, so much better than Siri.]

Damn. How did you find all this information about me, here I was trying to keep it on the down-low.

me: making light of my own country, it's happening.

[itsknighttime]

[[Sometimes he does things that people like, other times he's an annoying idiot.]]

Also easy.
I'm a Canadian masquerading as a Texan, eh hailing straight from good ol' Mon'real, in ze prov'ence of Qwe'bek. I bought a huge belt buckle and own at least several cowboy boots. Got to wear a jacket and call it a parka at all times, I had to learn at an early age that you don't slide down a hill on a american toboggan, you wear it on your head. That was one of the side arcs, montage of learning American words in difference to my own, modest, upraising by an RCMP officer and his wife that worked at Tim Hortons. I had to hide my maple syrup and disguise my polar bear as my wife and added a cardboard siding to my dogsled. Had to disguise it as a limo though, say it runs on sixteen to six horsepower depending on weather and terrain.

I've got t'know everything about the main character. I'm the comic relief in the series, that stoic sidekick that shows up and when you least expect it, holds off the hoards while the dubiously good guy goes and does something that steals the audience's hearts. I might or might not die, but in the end it's the bonding experience that matters and drives the story forward for the main character. You. You know, the kind of shit that solidifies him as the actual good guy despite that he has other kinds of frightening acts in his past that were more fuelled by the tragedies they don't find out until later about.

i am tipping my hat to you. no, not just mine. all the hats

[prizeneck]

[There's a light "fshhhhh" and some plates clanking at the distance, but Mamoru is listening intently.

He's not even hiding the amusement in his voice.]

My bad, I forgot the polar bear - I mean your wife's - name.

So what's the plan now? Take my story out to tell the masses? Create a bioflick?

lmao thank you for all those hats, I'm glad you're enjoying!

[itsknighttime]

[Dave realizes he's literally doing dishes. He never thought blind people did stuff. Terezi is a different story, she can at least taste the... why does that feel different? Hm. Maybe she never felt blind. Inward struggle aside.]

Oh. It's Karen, we had to say it was Karen. That way when the end mission comes along she can take the kids, no one asks questions. Maybe a few ask to see the manager if they have the right haircut but our boss who say she hates you but doesn't? She can ward them off pretty easy. Undecided if she's that crush from down the line or not though. Might be too coincidental and convoluted. Good for dynamic though. Anyway, Karen takes the kids and I can pretend to be a divorcee when really the RCMP backed by my Dad's command can come in and extract you. They had a message strapped to their neck and live or die my Dad's got your back. It's what I would have wanted.
I would have wanted him to bring down the full force of the RCM-fucking-P, full moose regalia charging forward with lacrosse sticks and hockey pads and screaming poutine. The food not the translation.

Man it's a hard sell? Do you wait and end up like Rambo?
Do you do a few side appearances in other people's shit to fuck up their world lore? Yeah that's the one. You show right up in other people's shit like "You thought it wasn't your actual earth? Bitch please." and people go home from the theatre quietly looking around for tron lines or guys in sunglasses driving impalas. Which is what you drive by the way. It's your day car, and your badass car but you've got other ones in the spy storage for if you're feeling a little more adventurous.

i'm amazed at how you can make his rambles on the fly

[prizeneck]

That sounds like a franchise in the works.

[Man, if only dishes were the only thing this guy did.

The water stops, and for a second, he sounds very, very amused. It's a gamble, a very wide one at that. Because - knocks on the fourth wall - no one else ever plays from this canon anyway and meta aside, the likelihood of him ever showing up on this plane of existence is very, very remote.

But, he's done worse (or better, considering). ]

Think you're forgetting one detail, though. My arch-nemesis, Jesus.

Thank you!! Those are high paid compliments! :blush: I'll write them any time you want lol

[itsknighttime]

It sure damn is. You gotta start somewhere though and then dream big.

[[Dave is, for all intents and purposes, shuffling around in a tiny blanket nest in the corner of his room, time to be a lazy lump and talk to people. His mun is as canon blind as blind is, but the guy seems so damn cool, even to Dave.]]

Fuck me.
How could I forget??
That would be the other thing I'm useful for, the time travel arc. That enemy might even stem from the actual chance that you were trying to get to those other franchises? Maybe you go back in time to warn me from the first movie where I actually die that I have to dodge left and all you say to me, finally catching up is "Dodge left" and I don't get it. Mainly because you were just there, helping Karen move out and drove off. No car, you're on foot then at that point and it leaves me confused.

But man I dodge left and it fucks up the whole timeline. There's no such thing as a Delorean so we're super ultra hella fucked and have to figure it out by the same cool tech that trons the fuck out of your sight. I bet Bill Murray's in it too. That guy's in everything. Anyway, we've got to go back in time and see what shit fixes what shit so we can go back in the future and not fuck it up but still be baller. Totally not plagiarised. FYI when we're back in time and you're posing as Jesus in an under cover role to infiltrate the disciples, I'm changing the last dinner to Olive Garden.

[prizeneck]

[He chuckles again.] Look, I've been to one once or twice and I have nothing bad to say about Olive Garden. I think it's a legit choice.

[itsknighttime]

[[Dave likes that he can actually make someone laugh and it not be at him.]]

Oh man. The bread sticks though. You had free will to go and you didn't go there every night? Now i'm convinced you had more important spy ninja things to do.

[prizeneck]

Wasn't allowed off base that often. [An actual truth, but it sounds like bullshit from a movie anyway.]

Training was harsh back then. Glad the squad took me there, or I would have lived off instant ramen for the whole stay.

[itsknighttime]

Ho.lee.fuck. We have to find out if they have an alien Olive Garden. Or at least the bread type. Not on the base no more and nice as it is, don't gotta worry about if your boys are there to take you. We're free captives now.

[prizeneck]

What do you think it's called around here?

[itsknighttime]

Probably something dumb and to do with celestial crap?
Like green ovalmoons.

[prizeneck]

Are the ovalmoons even green here? [Not that he can tell.]

[itsknighttime]

A question for the god damn ages, science still doesn't know. But nah, I don't know if you ever saw colour before but shit around here is...

[He's looking around, give him a second.]

Vibrant against a dark backdrop I guess? I mean not exactly that way, but a lot of things are eighties as fuck in my opinion.

[prizeneck]

Wasn't born blind, yeah.

[That's actually an interesting tidbit of information, considering his own sight aid is composed by green gridwork over blackness.]

I did wonder if that was the theme. Guess the aesthetics match, huh?