text | un: konoha

[lumberlady]

PLEASE ATTENTION

greetings! is KONOHA! you may know- woman jinba 人馬 👩🐎 CENTAUR? much apologies for bother after ”LmaO” trouble... send wellness wishes to damage or hurt people. please take care with LUNATIA city device. can make go into heat or influence head...

but! now SANGUIS 😡🌕 is coming, so in fact, i ask for people who like fight...

please consider fight my husband!

husband get much energy in SANGUIS, so need different way to use... but must be very strong or will be hurt by accident. i mean ”strong” as muscle strong 💪, not power strong, not weapon strong, not MAGIC strong. do not want any big injury, so need be able to fight and defend from mountain jinba. big mountain jinba, size is this:


^ is husband

if strong is about same and can fight husband for SANGUIS 😡🌕, i give CHROMA 💴 or pay with farm product 🥕🥔🥒. hand ✋ combat only!

if have interest, please say and send one photo!
(i respond voice or VIDEO! now is text for studies practice.)

much thanks to you for attention.

- KONOHA 🌳🍃

Comments

[mcring]

Something like that sounds better, yeah
Good idea

And he did, huh
Well then, sounds like Gladio's the man for the job alright

[ What does that even mean, is he still going to get chewed out for this or... ]

So you and Ignis know each other?

[lumberlady]

is deal!

yes! IGNIS and i is good friend! we meet moons ago.

you is friend also?

[mcring]

That long, wow
I'm glad to hear it.

I've known Ignis for basically my whole life
So yeah, we're pretty close
Hard to find a better guy to be friends with

[ Hopefully Ignis isn't having this thread read to him because wow that would get embarrassing quickly. ]

Let me guess, he was buying vegetables from you

[lumberlady]

what your name? possible i know!

exclaim! how you know? yes he buy!

[mcring]

Of course he was
Sorry, I skipped the introduction part, didn't I
I'm Noctis. It's nice to meet you, Konoha

[lumberlady]

NOCTIS!

yes! yes, i hear your name! is much glad to meet!

[mcring]

I don't want to know what kind of stories you've heard about me, do I?

[ aka can he still talk her out of selling Ignis vegetables or is it already a lost cause... ]

[lumberlady]

i hear you is good man! but no eat well!

[definitely a lost cause]

[mcring]

[ Damn it Ignis!!! ]

I eat just fine
My diet happens to only consist of things that taste good and not gross stuff, that's all
No offense to your vegetables
I'm sure other people like to eat them

[ A good man, though. Ignis said that...? Huh. ]

[lumberlady]

that is not correct!
vegetable taste good
you just need find cooking way to make taste good for you!

[mcring]

[ Yeah, right. If there were a way to make cooked vegetables taste good, Ignis would've already found it. Mincing them so they disappear and hiding them in casseroles doesn't count, either. Even though Ignis definitely does both of those things anyway, which is about the only way Noctis gets any veggies in his diet. Excluding— ]

Fried potatoes are good.

[ French fries. He's just talking about french fries. ]

[lumberlady]

[thankfully for noctis... konoha has been introduced to the wonders of french fries]

is so good!!!! i agree!

if you like, then allow me make you vegetable dish for try! i has idea.

[mcring]

[ Please no ]

You really don't have to do that

[lumberlady]

i like challenge!

if you no eat i 's husband eat, is no waste!

[mcring]

If you're sure, I guess
Couldn't hurt to try it

[ And yet Noctis can already taste the regret. This is karma for signing Gladio up to get his ass kicked in by horse hooves, isn't it. He should've stopped while he was ahead. ]

[lumberlady]

is deal!

please come with IGNIS? both recommend me GLADIO!

[mcring]

[ Of course, because if he's going to force himself to eat something disgusting, may as well have his friends there to laugh about it. Either this is karma in action or Konoha is actually savage and just great at hiding it. ]

Yeah, we'll make it a party
See you later, Konoha

[ Either way, Noctis is fucked. RIP NLC ]

[lumberlady]

i see you!!!

[which one is it................ hmmmmmmmmmmmmm...............

hope you don't mind trying vegetable tempura noctis]

[mcring]

[ He worked at a sushi restaurant in Insomnia, so he's well acquainted, though he's never tried to choke it down.

Spoilers: he's going to hate it. Sorry, Konoha! You're better off winning him over with fruit instead. Or veggie-free desserts. ]

[lumberlady]

[she accepts this challenge........................

but until she thinks of another food she'll just try and stuff him with daifuku]