it's cordis! but also like... late night (un: han_dy)

[showended]

hey so is there like a mermaid transport service in lunatia
as in, someone to help deliver moonblessed to the beach
or something
like this has to be a common problem, right?

my boyfriend suddenly turned into an orca and he's like 2 and a half meters long
he is SO heavy
there's no way in hell I can get him to the beach
help?
ideas? suggestions?
i will take any and all advice

oh by the way, i'm new here my name is han do-yoon

also accepting advice for how mermaids work
he smells really good
is that weird?

pls help

Comments

[glossophobia]

You'd think that by this point someone would offer some kind of moonblessed transport service for the people that get way too big for their house.

If you were still sanguis maybe you could have helped. They're supposed to get really strong during the sanguis moon. Well, I hope someone helps you out. Make sure he stays wet in the meantime?

[showended]

right? it's not that weird

i heard about that
i don't think i got super strength but maybe i just didn't check?
i've got him in the tub for now so he should be good for a while
i just feel bad stranding him there

[glossophobia]

Some changes are pretty common but I guess it's not unexpected to not experience a detail like that. It's the same with the animal changes. Not everyone becomes the same sort of animal. I get wings with my moonblessing but others usually turn into rabbits or deer or even get tentacles.

Just keep him company, it's the best you can do. It's frustrating for you but it must be even more frustrating for him.

[showended]

yeah I kinda thought if I got sanguis, I'd be a dog tbh

right
good point
he wouldn't say it but I bet he's frustrated

[glossophobia]

Because dogs are known for their ability to purr.

[ He's joking. ]

[showended]

yeah yeah very funny
i would've preferred something cool like a wolf or something

[glossophobia]

[ He used to be a comedian! ]

Do you not think that a bear is cool? They have a way bigger presence than a wolf does. Very intimidating.

Your boyfriend has his own teddy bear now.

[showended]

[ Hey at least Do-yoon has a sense of humor! ]

you just said it yourself
i was more of a teddy bear than a bear
plus i'm not exactly a big dude
it doesn't really go with my image

[glossophobia]

Even the animal features can be unexpected. For some people they get things that suit them, and others I guess it's just random? I still don't know why I'm a bird. Then again I never put much thought into what kind of animal suits me.

My boyfriend thought I should be an owl, but mostly because he made one of his stupid jokes out of it. Said I'm like a "know-it-owl".

[showended]

maybe i got a bear cause it's random

[ or cause you like snooping around, do-yoon.... ]

a bird huh
i mean i'll take it over a sheep or a fish
no offense to gyuhyuk
he's an orca not a fish anyway
probably would have been worse if he'd been a fish

ur boyfriend sounds like a class act
gyu-hyuk makes puns like that sometimes
it's so lame

[ he says, lovingly..... he likes that he's lame. ]

[glossophobia]

[ do-yogi bear........... ]

He'd be a lot easier to handle if he were a fish though. Place him inside a bowl and you could take him anywhere you want.

[ The diet of fish flakes would suck of course. ]

God please don't let them meet, his sense of humor's bad enough without any influence.

He's a comedian, by the way. I mean an actual comedian. It's his career.

[showended]

he's not literally an entire whale he's a merwhale
i meant cuz he can breathe out of the water
i'm not gonna put my boyfriend in a fishbowl either
i can't believe that's a sentence i just typed unironically

lol well i can't stop him if he does

oh wow like an actual comedian?
that must suck for u, does he practice all of his material nonstop?

[ says the guy who wrote his boyfriend a song for his birthday... ]

[glossophobia]

He's still 2 and a half meters long that's huge! What do you prefer merwhale or merfish??

[ Tiny Gyu-hyuk merfish who is like less than 10 inches long... ]

And it's not that he practices he just never knows to shut up with his jokes. They're terrible off stage too, they're either horrible puns or dirty jokes.

[showended]

ok fair ig
he's a big guy normally tho
he could probably lift me no problem

[ Do-yoon likes them big...... no stop jan ]

ahh so it's 24/7 huh
that's gotta get old
still ur dating him tho so u must not hate it

[glossophobia]

[ Jan yamete ]

That so? I didn't think to expect him looking like that. Guess there really was a reason he turned into an orca then.

[ Big guy, huh... yet he seems to have such a kind, gentle disposition. ]

The thing with him is we used to be partners. We did comedy together. In Japan, when you have a pair like that they call it "manzai". Someone plays the funny man who sets up the jokes, and the other is the straight man who reacts.

[showended]

he's stronger than he looks
but he's a gentle guy

[ Then again, maybe Do-yoon is just skinny. But Gyu-hyuk really does have like 10kgs of muscle on him... ]

huh...
no wonder he never stops then
were you guys any good?

1/2

[glossophobia]

[ Gentle he says... and yet orcas are also known as "killer whales". ]

[glossophobia]

We were good, yes. Even though we only performed for a year.

[showended]

[ HE'S A GENTLE GUY......!!!! You'll make him cry if you call him a killer whale, Rosho! ]

just a year huh?
something happen?

u were partners in work and now ur dating
what's that like?

[ He's actually asking for himself, not even to be a dick. ]

[glossophobia]

[ HE WON'T HE PROMISES Rosho can't make anyone cry except himself. ]

Things just didn't work out in the end so we broke up.

[ The abridged version of the story. ]

He's my complete opposite. His infinite energy's unbearable. He's super loud and nosy and loves attention. He keeps trying to get me to do comedy with him again, all the time, no matter how many times I say no. Sometimes I don't know why I put up with him.

I've been in love with him since the first time we met. We didn't talk for eight years, and I missed him that whole time.

So it's something like that. He's got his flaws but I can't imagine my life without him.

[showended]

[ GOOD... tho be careful with Gyuhyuk he cries very easily. ]

i get that
sometimes things like that can happen...
i was with my band for a long time
but we split a few months ago
it sucks

[ give him a minute, he's choking up at Rosho's confession because, wow. Good thing is is text so you can't see him get a little emotional. ]

damn.....
that's really romantic
idk what to say

i'm glad u guys have each other here

[glossophobia]

[ They were both truly meant to be friends... ]

I don't know if I'd call it romantic. I feel like our relationship's a bit of a mess. But I really am happy being with him.

Thanks.

How did you start dating Gyu-hyuk? If I can ask.

[showended]

[ Yes... brothers in crying and being bad at talking to their boyfriends... ]

it's super romantic

uh well kind of a long story
i've kinda always thought he was hot
i mean who doesn't, he's ranked 1st for a reason
on the show we were both on, i mean
he had this cute nerdy look before but when they cleaned up his look it was like
wow
i mean have u seen him?
yeah

so then i saved his life, back home
a lot of stuff happened
then when we showed up here i saved his life again, because of the nightmares
it was kind of a spur of the moment thing
but i'd always wanted to ask him out
that just seemed like a good time

[glossophobia]

[ Do-yoon that is a lot of backstory to unload here... hi hello are you idols okay what the hell?? ]

He mentioned a show to me called BStars. Was that the same one you were on?

I'm sorry you two had to go through such a difficult time here. Various sorts of things tend to happen every once in a while that I would say are, for lack of a better word, fucked up. It can be a struggle.

But it brought you two together, so even in those difficult times, something worked out for you both. I'm glad for that.

[showended]

[ He was even vague about the "things happened" bit, so that's what you get for asking, bro (they are not okay. remotely. it's fine!!!) ]

yeah that's right
buried stars
we were on season 4 together

it probably wouldn't have been so bad if it hadn't been nightmares
but like u said, it brought us closer together

honestly things are already better here than back home
because of our careers we could never have dated
so despite all the bad stuff, i'm glad too