Text - Anonymous

[foolishjustice]

I have a question, that...you'll probably understand my reasons for posting anonymously once you finish reading.

The local culture is very open and laid back about sexual interest. It's different as hell from my own home, where men who show sexual attraction are viewed as disgusting perverts and assumed to be dangerous, while people don't even fucking think about women having an interest in sex beyond wanting to have children. Some of the posts I've seen here would get everyone involved labeled sexual deviants for the shit they talk about in the open.

My question is, how do people adapt to it? I'm here doing my damn best to keep my mind out of the gutter because I've been taught thinking about anyone you don't want to date like that is disrespectful as hell and fucking creepy, but then I turn around and see people openly asking for hookups or rating each other's asses, and instead of people calling that shit skeevy, they either go along with it or treat it like a funny joke.

I know it's not prudishness, believe-you-fucking-me, my life would be easier if I was just naturally shy or reserved or whatever. It's an extreme form of culture shock, and I wish I didn't end up feeling like a dick constantly over the kinds of mental images I get from both the way people act in public around here and some of the things the prismals hand out as fucking party favors.

Comments

[foolishjustice]

People are trying to say to ignore it, but I don't know how the hell I'd do that without shutting myself away.

If I was the kind of person who could just ignore it, I wouldn't be having this problem in the first place. Is it the same sort of thing for you?

[yumenope]

It is a very hedonistic culture here. I don't see the harm of not ignoring it.

It's always been easy for me to avoid, here and previously. More pervasive than usual, but it doesn't necessarily bother me.

Of course, if you factor in the Chroma and moon effects, that is an entirely different discussion.

[foolishjustice]

Chroma isn't really a problem for me anymore, and even when it was, it was just because I'm used to a lot of pressure to keep your hands to yourself. I don't actually mind being affectionate.

Maybe I'm just imagining the potential harm, or alert for it because my shitty father harasses women. I keep thinking that acknowledging sexual attraction to people I'm not dating is the first step toward becoming a predatory asshole.

[yumenope]

I can see the conundrum. Rest assured, my inclination from this place is that the fear is ungrounded.

That being said, it is just an opinion.

I don’t know the particulars. For example, you may be a misogynistic tyrant for all I know.

[foolishjustice]

That description is perfect for my father.

I sure as hell hope the women I know don't think of me as misogynistic.

[yumenope]

I suppose if you’re aware enough to fear it, it likely isn’t true. I don’t seem the issue with indulgence, then.

After all, it’s primal, to some degree.

[foolishjustice]

Someone else told me something like that, too. That actually caring if I hurt people already makes me better than my father...

[yumenope]

So the saying goes. Those interested in the human psyche would say that if you’re capable of such concerns and introspection, you likely aren’t what you fear to be. Not a fail-proof methodology, but interesting nonetheless.

[foolishjustice]

I know the assholes I dealt with back home never worried about it. They all had some sort of justification or another for why they should be able to do whatever the hell they wanted.

[yumenope]

A dangerous school of thought. Are they visitors of this place, too?