Goro Akechi (
foolishjustice) wrote in
prismatica2019-08-21 12:30 am
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
Entry tags:
- fate/: marie antoinette,
- granblue fantasy: jessica,
- hollow knight: grimm,
- hypnosis mic: gentaro yumeno,
- hypnosis mic: hifumi izanami,
- magi: titus alexius,
- metal gear: otacon,
- no more heroes: travis touchdown,
- original character: fish,
- persona 3: minako arisato,
- persona 4: chie satonaka,
- persona 4: rise kujikawa,
- persona 4: souji seta,
- persona 4: yosuke hanamura,
- persona 5: ann takamaki,
- persona 5: goro akechi,
- persona 5: ren amamiya,
- voltron: matt holt,
- voltron: pidge
Text - Anonymous
I have a question, that...you'll probably understand my reasons for posting anonymously once you finish reading.
The local culture is very open and laid back about sexual interest. It's different as hell from my own home, where men who show sexual attraction are viewed as disgusting perverts and assumed to be dangerous, while people don't even fucking think about women having an interest in sex beyond wanting to have children. Some of the posts I've seen here would get everyone involved labeled sexual deviants for the shit they talk about in the open.
My question is, how do people adapt to it? I'm here doing my damn best to keep my mind out of the gutter because I've been taught thinking about anyone you don't want to date like that is disrespectful as hell and fucking creepy, but then I turn around and see people openly asking for hookups or rating each other's asses, and instead of people calling that shit skeevy, they either go along with it or treat it like a funny joke.
I know it's not prudishness, believe-you-fucking-me, my life would be easier if I was just naturally shy or reserved or whatever. It's an extreme form of culture shock, and I wish I didn't end up feeling like a dick constantly over the kinds of mental images I get from both the way people act in public around here and some of the things the prismals hand out as fucking party favors.
The local culture is very open and laid back about sexual interest. It's different as hell from my own home, where men who show sexual attraction are viewed as disgusting perverts and assumed to be dangerous, while people don't even fucking think about women having an interest in sex beyond wanting to have children. Some of the posts I've seen here would get everyone involved labeled sexual deviants for the shit they talk about in the open.
My question is, how do people adapt to it? I'm here doing my damn best to keep my mind out of the gutter because I've been taught thinking about anyone you don't want to date like that is disrespectful as hell and fucking creepy, but then I turn around and see people openly asking for hookups or rating each other's asses, and instead of people calling that shit skeevy, they either go along with it or treat it like a funny joke.
I know it's not prudishness, believe-you-fucking-me, my life would be easier if I was just naturally shy or reserved or whatever. It's an extreme form of culture shock, and I wish I didn't end up feeling like a dick constantly over the kinds of mental images I get from both the way people act in public around here and some of the things the prismals hand out as fucking party favors.
no subject
Maybe you should think about if you really don't want to ask her to share, or if you're just so used to the idea of someone being there first meaning you've lost your chance that you can't imagine anything else. It sounds like you're telling yourself it's already too late, and getting so caught up in the consequences of putting your hopes on this one person that it's hard to shift to thinking there's still a chance.
Also, for what it's worth, I think the idea that a woman should only be known to love one man is bullshit. That kind of thing is how women get stuck in abusive relationships, because they think that if they leave, they'll spend the rest of their lives alone because they're like someone else's hand-me-downs.
no subject
I feel like you know me too well already and you don't even know who I am! Stop that! It... absolutely does feel like that. Getting there first is winning, being second means you're just a fill-in. I was so fixated on him for so long, I didn't want to give up the hope or I'd feel like I wasted so much. Not that I don't value his friendship, of course! Just, you know, how limited options seem, back home.
That whole "purity" thing. It's definitely like relating girls to hand-me-downs. Ugh, that's so gross! I hate it so much! But I play right into it! I have my whole life!
no subject
But, try thinking about the pressure to find someone, and how that might make the one who was there first question things. I don't think being first or second, or fifth for that matter, makes you more or less significant. What's important is that your partner chooses to spend time with you, even when you know there's nothing pressuring them into it.
The 'second-hand' bullshit pisses me off. It's what lets cheating assholes get away with having affairs, since all the woman involved think they're ruined for anyone else and don't have an option of leaving. Especially with what women over 25 have to put up with in the workplace. I don't think there's any shit like that here, though, so maybe you can work on fighting back against that mindset.
no subject
[A boy idol? Possibly, he hasn't said anything to contradict.]
There's a lot to think about in general. I should... try to re-evaluate what I think their perspective might be, though. I guess I don't know what anyone else is thinking...
[She doesn't actually know what's going through Chie and Souji's heads.]
Sounds like you've had some direct experience with these things.
It would be nice... to not be so caught up in the idea of purity. To not feel like I have to just keep myself available for anyone in the world by denying myself. I just... always thought I'd have to be sneaky about it. You know?
no subject
My mother was the mistress of an utter piece of shit. After he dumped her by the side of the road because she got pregnant, she was pretty much on her own.
I get it. I try to seem approachable, and people knowing how dirty my mind gets would leave girls thinking I'm just another asshole looking at them like pinup posters. Plus being bisexual back home will get you a lot of shit even if you only show interest in people you're dating.
no subject
Well, as a girl, and as a girl who has dealt with creeps, I don't think just having a sex drive makes you one. It's like... you don't think it's okay to just say and do whatever, you wouldn't get mad if she were to turn you down, right?
I've... met people who have managed to compliment my looks and tell me they're attracted to me without making me uncomfortable. It makes me feel really good, actually. It's all in how you say it.
no subject
I guess I've never really thought about how differently someone would feel if they were approached politely. None of the people who compliment me on my looks have any fucking tact, so it just ends up making me feel like they see me like some kind of walking dakimakura...
no subject
I know how frustrating that can be, though. Doing your best to drop hints and get someone's attention, and it just... doesn't work. It hurts. I'm sorry you went through that.
Well if I ever find you around I'll give you a good ol' nonthreatening approach ok? Cause you sound pretty attractive to me, giving all this good advice. I can totally be tactful, and you deserve that.
no subject
We're both anonymous, though, so I'm not sure how either of us would know it if we did run into each other.
no subject
And then watch out for compliments!
Seriously, though, thank you. I don't know if this will apply to me, but it helps to know someone who feels the same, also sees some things differently.
no subject