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[mutantblood]

UN: carcinoGeneticist

[ It would be no exaggeration to say that this message had been in progress for at least a day. Not for the sake of complexity, but because the author was too frustrated to want to do more than keysmash his handy-dandy new device as well as its screen would allow. It wasn't as if the locals hadn't been as helpful as they could, but a lack of control and a healthy dose of confusion made for an especially cranky troll. And this troll is a cranky little creature by default. ]

I DID NOT CONSENT TO BEING SWEPT THE FUCK AWAY AND DUNKED INTO SOME BULLSHIT PSYCHEDELIC NEON NIGHTMARE.
WHICH LOCAL ASSHAT DO I NEED TO HISS AND SPIT AT TO GET SOME *ACTUAL* GODDAMN ANSWERS AROUND HERE?

AND I DON'T WANT TO HEAR ANY MORE OF THAT FROND-FUCKING SPIRITUALITY CRAP.
FEED ME SOME COLD, HARD FACTS.
OR I RIOT. AND THAT'S NOT A THREAT.
IT'S A PROMISE.

Comments

[mutantblood]

OH FUCK NO.
I'M A TROLL.
ALTERNIAN, BECAUSE IT MATTERS.

I KNOW HUMANS.
CONSIDERING YOUR CLEAR EXCITEMENT OVER SOMETHING AS MUNDANE AS HATCHING I'M GOING TO ASSUME YOU'RE NOT FAMILIAR WITH TROLLS.
I DON'T SMELL ANY OTHER TROLLS HERE.

[immature]

no im not a
troll
but i think its pretty cool that there are other types of people being brought here
at least thats one good thing about this place

[mutantblood]

SO THE ONE SINGULAR POSITIVE OF THIS PLANET IS THE SHEER CLUSTERFUCK OF ABDUCTEES?
YOU'RE GOING TO HAVE TO TRY HARDER IF YOU WANT YOUR OPTIMISM TO SEEM EVEN REMOTELY REASONABLE.

[immature]

hey man i wanna go home just as badly as you but idk if its possible
no one seems to know how

[mutantblood]

DON'T BE SO PASSIVE.
WITH ATTITUDES LIKE THAT IT'S NO WONDER THAT NOBODY KNOWS JACK SHIT HERE.

HAVE YOU EVEN *TRIED* ANYTHING?
HAS ANYONE???

[immature]

how should i know
the first week i was here i was kidnapped by this asshole cult that locked me in a cage for several days before i was rescued
a lot of shits been goin down and i think everyones been too distracted to riot

[mutantblood]

WAIT WHAT????
HOW WAS THIS NOT SOMETHING YOU MENTIONED EARLIER????
MALICIOUS KIDNAPPING CULTS SOUND PRETTY FUCKING IMPORTANT.

[immature]

i know right?
these people shouldve warned us before bringing us here
then again no ones exactly sure how we arrived

[mutantblood]

THE CULT.
DID YOU CALL THE DRONES OR WHATEVER THE HELL THIS TEMPORALLY CHALLENGED SHITSTAIN OF A UNIVERSE HAS???

WAS ANYTHING DONE ABOUT THAT OR???

[immature]

p sure all the members are in jail now
or i hope
we were rescued
eventually