[voice]; un: TheChancellor

[profanation]

[ The words are spoken with a lingering, loving attention. Every syllable is caressed by the tongue and lips before being allowed out. There's even a slight pause between words that makes the sentence measured and slow, like someone reading a line from an erotic novel. ]

You are now aware of your tongue.

Comments

voice

[codecmoment]

[ Well, that lit something in him, which is embarrassing. His response is short and curt. ]

Ardyn.

voice

[profanation]

Hello Hal!

[ Ardyn sounds cheery and altogether jovial. ]

You sound like you're about to give me a telling-off!

[codecmoment]

I am. It's time to use my Dad Voice on you.

[ Which he never really used anyway, but he can sound displeased regardless. ]

Some people find this stuff creepy, and I would appreciate it if you didn't go around licking people's ears without consent.

[profanation]

I'm five years old and feel terrible.

[ Says an entirely unrepentant Ardyn. He smiles. ]

Say, Hal? Do you have a moment?

[codecmoment]

Five times two hundred, or something like that. I can do algebra, too.

[ He's not sure he's ready for this, but okay. ]

I do... why?

[profanation]

Do you think you could fill out a survey for me?

[ The notification blinks. Attachment linked! ]

It would make my day!

[codecmoment]

[ He's computer savvy enough to check what it links to before clicking. ]

What will this information be used for? Will it be linked to my account, ID, or IP?

[profanation]

Not in the slightest. It's an anonymous survey for the Moonblessed to fill out to gauge feeling towards the Lunatian Government. That's all.

[codecmoment]

I'm keeping my opinions to myself and away from the network, thank you.

[ Because he knows how hacking and data collection and monitoring works. Ardyn, he likes you, but he's started to really think critically about the behavior of the government and the Moonblessed's keepers here. And it is not entirely trusting. ]

[profanation]

Fair enough!

[ He doesn't sound put out at all. ]

[codecmoment]

Is it for your political studies?

[ Ardyn doing his PoliSci internship here in Lunatia. ]

[profanation]

In the same way that an uncaring boss tells a barista that they must try to up-sell a customer who only wants a small cup of black coffee.

[codecmoment]

[ What? He doesn't understand, but he gets tired of Ardyn getting tired of his inability to pick up on... whatever this is supposed to be. ]

You're just up to mischief, then?

[profanation]

Not at all. A higher-up in the Lunar Scientia just asked me to make and distribute a survey to the Moonblessed about their experiences with the government.

That's all.

[codecmoment]

Oh! Well... sorry, I can't help you with your busy work. I still respect what you're doing for us Moonblessed.

[profanation]

Ha! [ Ardyn sounds amused, but he's not displeased. ] I'm afraid I don't do much at all, but thank you.

[codecmoment]

Any time.

[ Phew. Actually having to talk to Ardyn made him less flustered. The lewd shine comes off when you deal with him in his normal context: a cheeky, ancient middle aged uncle looking for a nap. ]

[profanation]

Oh, I just had a thought!

Given your reaction, I imagine you've changed your mind about what I should be doing on the network here, then?

[codecmoment]

No, I'd prefer you didn't be mildly lewd without warning. I'm glad people aren't posting dickpics here as it is, except that one guy the one time.

[profanation]

But having me read things out is just fine?

[codecmoment]

How did you get that out of me chiding you?

[ This feels like a trap. ]

[profanation]

You told me before I should narrate things. That's what I'm referring to!

[codecmoment]

I mean, yeah... you have a nice voice. Soothing and warm, when you want it to be.

[profanation]

But not so much in practice, mm?

[codecmoment]

Just tell me what you're trying to get me to say.