[voice]; un: TheChancellor

[profanation]

[ The words are spoken with a lingering, loving attention. Every syllable is caressed by the tongue and lips before being allowed out. There's even a slight pause between words that makes the sentence measured and slow, like someone reading a line from an erotic novel. ]

You are now aware of your tongue.

Comments

voice; un: matriarch

[menphina]

[ ... sure must be a slow day if people are posting things like this.

Even slower if she's thinking of replying to it. ]

... are you sure? Think I'm more aware of yours right now. And not in the fun way.

[profanation]

Well, of course I'm not sure your personal experience!

[ The response sounds friendly and amused. ]

Since I do have your attention, is there something that you could do for me?

[Text; un: turntechGodhead]

[itsknighttime]

im aware of a man who isnt me that has an asmr kink rn
whats your social experiment about?

[text]

[profanation]

Social Experiment?
I'm just an old man looking for a slice of fun pie :)
But you did remind me of something!

voice;

[synchroswim]

_{[Hear that? That's the sad, sad groan of a defeated Nobody.]}

Dude. What'd I ever do to you?

[profanation]

[ Ardyn laughs in response. ]

I do apologize, but it did get your attention, didn't it?

text | un: fantasma

[teaserving]

oh my god fuck you i was wearing headphones
stop this

text

[profanation]

I sincerely apologize!

audio; un: usernamehere

[omkara]

(First of all, what the hell is a username, second of all, is this addressed to him, third of all, he responds on accident...)

-at this thing is talking.. what did it say? Damn.. Oh. (There's gentle taps and scrapes coming through audio as well.) What did you say? (He finally figures out he's opened up a two-way-line.)

Hello? Can you hear me?

[profanation]

[ Ardyn listens with a bemused expression, then smiles at the question. ]

No.

voice; un: magichands

[slyguy]

Interesting. I've also heard it's best not to notice every time you blink. You really shouldn't pay attention to it at all.

[profanation]

[ Ardyn laughs in response. He should have thought of that one! ]

It's true! And reminding yourself of the pressure in your ears is a terrible thing. You might be tempted to try to re-balance it to make sure it's all right!

voice ➤ bestninja

[braverpath]

Lewd!

[This sounds quite lewd, sir. Mind not reading your erotic novels here?]

Must you broadcast such debauchery for all to hear?

[profanation]

[ There's a sharp gasp, as if offended. ]

My dear sir! If that is where your mind went then it is no fault of mine!

[ It absolutely is. ]

If you cannot think about your tongue without thinking of lewdness, then that speaks more for yourself than for me!

voice

[codecmoment]

[ Well, that lit something in him, which is embarrassing. His response is short and curt. ]

Ardyn.

voice

[profanation]

Hello Hal!

[ Ardyn sounds cheery and altogether jovial. ]

You sound like you're about to give me a telling-off!

voice

[lifehacker]

Dude, why did you give all those words a rimjob, and then blast it into my fuckin' ears?

voice

[profanation]

I can't tell you, my good sir! You're the one who pressed 'play'.

text; un: percival

[vassalize]

[ He feels like he needs to go clean his ears after hearing that. ]

Stop that. You just made my device screech from speaking that closely into the speech transmitter.

text

[profanation]

How impressive of me, given that it was sitting on the table when I made my post.
If you take the device to the Lunar Scientia and submit it for a maintenance check, I'm sure that issue can be resolved in a timely manner.
:)

voice; un: completionist

[sassian]

Well I am certainly now aware of your tongue.

that un.....

[profanation]

[ Ardyn gave a loud, fake gasp. ]

Your Radiance! One might think you're being inappropriate, with a comment like that!

[text] un: Twilight

[envoyoftwilight]

I can't wait for the explanation on this one.

[No. Really. Go ahead. She'll wait.]

[text]

[profanation]

Hello there Midna!
I'm just being cheeky :)

[huaisang]

Am I? I don't know, I don't think I wanted to be aware of any tongues.

[profanation]

Didn't you? My goodness. I'll remember that for later.

text | j.valentine

[torsion]

Got a lot of free time, huh.

[profanation]

[ There's a delay in this response as Ardyn laughs for a solid minute about how absolutely true that statement is. ]

I do get a mandatory fifteen minute break every working day!

[hagrides]

Are humans not typically informed that they have tongues?

[He sounds genuinely confused.]

[profanation]

[ Well, there's no mistaking that hoarse voice. Ardyn responds in a cheerful way. ]

Well hello there, Grimm! Your dulcet tones are always a pleasure to hear.

[ Which isn't actually a lie, despite how insincere it might sound. ]

For your question, humans do know they have one, but they're a body part that's not often thought of. Bringing attention to it can make people feel uncomfortable aware of it.

voice | un: stormflower

[sleepinglotus]

Thanks. I hate it.

[profanation]

[ Ardyn's laugh made the response all the more jaunty and jovial sounding. ]

Happy to serve!

[Audio]

[burnt_offering]

Kinda hard not to be after that. [What is with this guy? That was pretty forward sounding...] Is this how you usually talk? Or is it a special occasion?

[profanation]

Doesn't everyone have different manners of speech depending on the occasion?

[ The response has the exact same lingering manner as the initial post. ]

text;

[darkcharge]

And just what is that supposed to achieve?

[profanation]

Attention.
:)

un: kol

[gradual]

pineapples. eating that makes one quite aware of it.

[profanation]

That's right! They do have an enzyme that breaks down flesh, or so I've heard.

voice; un: Red

[fafa]

[ There is a pause, expecting more. ]

And...?

[profanation]

And would you be interested in filling out a survey for the Lunatian Government?

text; 1/2

[mcring]

[ Why are you like this, old man?? ]

And you're now breathing manually

[ There. Take that. ]

2/2

[mcring]

[ Wait ]

You DO breathe right?

[ Technically, he doesn't have to, does he? There's so much you can do when you don't have to breathe...

And all of it is a lot of mental imagery about Ardyn that Noctis never needed to have in his life. So thanks double for that. Even though it's kind of his own fault. ]