un: coolguy

[soupervillain]

CALLING ALL VILLAINS, EVILDOERS, AND GENERAL BAD GUYS!!!

GOOD GUYS DO NOT READ THIS!!!

(that means you)
Okay, now that that's out of the way! I'm Giovanni Potage, captain of the Banzai Blasters. (Please hold all autograph requests until we meet in person.) Any fellow bad guys want to team up and commit some crimes sometime? My knife-bat hand's getting kinda itchy, if you know what I mean. Know any good museums to rob? Shops to lift? Parks to litter in? Say the word!!

- Giovanni Potage
Captain of the Banzai Blasters

Comments

text; un: lucio

[poopio]

This does seem to be quite an interesting way to pass your hours here.
Is this an open invitation to attend the proceedings of the "Banzai Blasters"?

[soupervillain]

SURE IS, buddy!!! Except... we don't really have any proceedings right now, 'cause I'm kind of the only one in this world. That I know of. You haven't seen any guys in snazzy yellow uniforms around, have you?

[poopio]

I have not, but if one is required,
I can procure it an advance for my attendance.

Please feel free to conduct the proceedings as usual and do not mind my presence.

[soupervillain]

[ Someone actually wants to come to one of his meetings?! This is Giovanni's chance to finally recruit a new minion - but how's he going to make the BBs look impressive when their membership in this world consists of one guy, and you're looking at him? Well, luckily, he's evil, so he's allowed to lie! ]

Sure you can come!!! Did I say there are no other Banzai Blasters around?? There totally are! Like, twelves of them!! They're probably all gonna be busy with important life events next meeting, though, so it might be just you and me. Hope that's cool!! Oh, and if you wanna get yourself a uniform, they look like this:

[ Attached is a selfie. ]

Just don't include the cape. That's my thing.

[poopio]

It is a shame they will not be able to attend.
I was quite looking forward to meeting them all and hearing more of the
auspicious activities of the Banzai Blasters.
Shall I bring something to the meeting? Perhaps, snacks and refreshments?

[ Oh, he has no plans in partaking in the evil scheming and wrong-doings, but this man looks like he could use a friend... judging by the other responses. ]

[soupervillain]

Yeah, sorry, everyone told me they'd be busy that day, real bad timing. Hey, but I'm totally psyched to hang out with you, though! I'll tell you about all my escapades back in my world, and you can tell me how awesome they were, like a good minion!

And snacks would be rad, dude, thanks! Any way I can chip in?

[ Yeah, he wasn't expecting it to be quite so challenging to get a villainous foothold in this world. Having a friend around... well. It couldn't hurt. ]

[poopio]

There is no need.
I have the excess chroma to spare, and I work in a cafe.
Whatever is not purchased that evening can be donated as it would go to waste otherwise.

Have you any plans that are stirring, or would you prefer to keep it quiet until the meeting?

[soupervillain]

Wow dude, that is so nice of you!! Hey, if you ever need free soup for any kind of occasion, just say the word!!!

Sorry, all our plans are TOP SECRET!!! Since SOME people (GOOD GUYS) don't know when to keep their noses out of clearly marked posts!!! All will be revealed to you at the meeting, I promise!!

[ Aaand now he has to come up with some plans. ]

[poopio]

I shall keep the offer in mind.
Though I am not hungry at the moment, I am certain there are others out there who may require it more.

And I understand.
I will continue to look forward to this meeting with bated breath.

By the way, I have not yet introduced myself.
Please call me Lucio, a mere curious wanderer.
It is a pleasure to meet you.

[soupervillain]

Nice to meet you, Lucio!! My name's Giovanni!! GIOVANNI POTAGE!!! Remember it, because one day it'll be the name of the guy who RULES THE WORLD!!! Although... I guess at that point you wouldn't have to remember it. Could probably just wiki it. ANYWAY I'll see you at the meeting!!!

[poopio]

Wiki?

If I may inquire before you leave-
is it this world you hope to rule?

[soupervillain]

Oh sorry!! Wiki means a website that tells you about what stuff is!! So you could type in WORLD, and right there in the article it would say RULER: GIOVANNI POTAGE. Nice and simple!!

Honestly, I was really hoping to rule my world back home?? But since I'm kinda not there anymore, this one will have to do!!

[poopio]

How convenient. I will have to search for this wiki website next time I am on the web to confirm for myself.

And should you return home, who will be ruling in your stead?
This world may become unstable if its leader were to vanish abruptly.

[soupervillain]

DO IT!! It's super useful!!

Oh. That's... a really good question. I guess I'd appoint my most trusted minion as my potential successor!! As soon as I have enough minions here to have a most trusted one!!!

[poopio]

Would a native not be more ideal?
Your minion too can vanish.
As I believe it, all of us are here on an impermanent basis.
Our tenure in this world is tenuous at best.

[soupervillain]

Then I'll get a native to be my second most trusted minion!! You can never have too many minions, I always say!!!

[poopio]

I do hope you intend to subjugate them with kindness rather than wrath.
The Prismals respond and grant their loyalty to those who treat them well -lest your empire ends up overthrown in the future after
you have left.

[soupervillain]

I absolutely will!! Giovanni Potage is a benevolent dictator!!! Have I not done my minions' rights spiel at you yet??

[poopio]

This is true.
You have given me no reason to question your benevolence.

[ Minus all that talk about evil deeds but. ]

I suppose I have your long and happy reign to look forward to now.

[soupervillain]

You sure do!!! I promise I'll let you know as soon as it starts!! >:D