text; un: weiwuxian

[resurging]

[ here's some disclosure: wei wuxian is wasted. ridiculously, hilariously wasted, thanks to the festivities surrounding the new year, and he's feeling fond. a little generous, too. maybe a little too generous?

anyway, this concerns his brother. the younger one, with the deep frown lines. jiang cheng!

wei wuxian has painstakingly typed this message, so please appreciate the effort that it took to write this in his inebriated state. ]

TO ALL THAT I MAY TROUBLE FOR A MINUTE OR TWO!

I humbly present my brother, Jiang Cheng of the Yunmeng Jiang, for your pleasure.

He is a handsome man, ranked fifth most desirable back home, and he is seeking companionship! He works hard, harder than anyone I know, and he is one of the kindest people you'll ever meet. He likes soup, sparring, and small furry animals. His favorite color is lavender, because it brings out the color of his eyes! His swordsmanship is pretty good, and uh, he's very vocal! Loudly vocal, actually, his lungs are very strong. Great if you like that kind of thing!

If you're looking for a day of adventure, or a night of pleasant conversation, please consider Jiang Cheng!

For those interested, feel free to contact me, Wei Wuxian, and I shall arrange your dates for you. Or you can also speak to him directly! He gets very shy, though, so don't be surprised if he acts a bit weird at first.

THANK YOU FOR YOUR ATTENTION!

Comments

text; un: xue.qing

[firstkissofsteel]

I wish I never learned how to turn on text-to-speech.

[resurging]

WOULD YOU LIKE A DATE WITH MY BROTHER, I PROMISE HE'S VERY NICE

1/???

[consignation]

[consignation]

[consignation]

[consignation]

ok done; txt; un: xiaohan

[consignation]

WEI WIUXNAN TURN ON YOUR LOCATION

text; un: idontknow

[huaisang]

Wei-xiong, what are you doing?

[resurging]

helping. jiang cheng has been very sad and he needs more friends.

« text » un: foxlike

[foxtouched]

Your brother is here, Master Wei Wuxian? That's wonderful... I hope you can find him a "date" soon! Is he very shy?

[resurging]

he can be shy! well, in his own way. his shyness seems like rudeness sometimes, but he's a very good person underneath it all!

( text, un: lavieenrose )

[affectueux]

He sounds very nice, but you should delete this.

[resurging]

ah? is it offensive?

text: un: maiden.jin

[infiniteheart]

This is very kind and thoughtful of you, A-Xian, but I believe he already has someone special in his life.

[She's but an innocent bystander in all of this, confused by twins from alternate universes and now usernames on the internet. After all, she knows of two Wei Wuxians and two Jiang Chengs now. How is she to know which ones are which from text alone?]

[resurging]

ah? he does? how do you know? and who is this! how many jins are there here! are you the special lady in his life???

text: teacupprincess

[porcelainandblood]

If any of mine brothers ever did something like this, I would be utterly livid. I cannot imagine that your brother is going to be terribly pleased with you interfering in such a way.

[resurging]

he's already yelling at me for helping, it's all right. i'll continue to survive, and he'll continue to not reach out and make the first move towards true love.

do you want to try, though? he's a decent cook.

text — un: dontannoyme

[pushpin]

u buyin the food ?
alternatively i take money upfront

[resurging]

eh? i mean, sure! food i can do! what kind of food do you like?

text | un: stormflower

[sleepinglotus]

I have this distinct feeling your brother may not be very happy with you about this.

[resurging]

it's a very accurate feeling because he wants to kill me now. it's fine, he loves me anyway!

text | username: absterge

[downswing]

Wei Ying. Spare some grace.

[resurging]

i am being very graceful! i haven't fallen off the rooftop yet!

[Video] un: beitangmoran

[beitangmoran]

... Does your brother know you are doing this on his behalf, young master Wei?

[resurging]

this is a surprise! no one tell him yet!

well, he already knows, so don't tell him anyway. but look, i'm being helpful!

text | un: mcarter

[mucked]

It's true that he did come across as rather shy when we first met.

[ well—right up until they started discussing the relative reality (or unreality) of ghosts. ]

Even so. Did you speak with him before crafting this particular broadcast?

[she doesn't much care that she's never met the person to whom she's actually replying. she's met jiang cheng, she rather liked him, and she knows that she'd blow several gaskets if someone—even a brother!—pulled a stunt like this with her. ]

[resurging]

[ she's correct, of course, in her assumptions. wei wuxian is going to die very soon, and it'll be because of fratricide. fully justified, in this case! no one ever accused of wei wuxian of not living on the edge. ]

if i asked him he'd tell me not to! so i've elected not to ask and just go forth and do!

text; un: zewujun

[ze_uwu_jun]

Young master Wei, is that the wisest course of action...?

[resurging]

it's a course of action, zewu-jun! a very sincere course of action!

text, un: xiuya

[originalshen]

You write like a drunkard trying to auction off his wife.

[resurging]

he's not my wife he's my brother.

i may be a little drunk, though.

« text » un: warsheep

[aries_saint]

Ranked fifth? That wasn't a bad number. And so many good qualities! I hope your brother finds the right one.

Is there any particular hurry...?

[Inquiring, curious minds wants to know~.]

[resurging]

[ wei wuxian is a supporter of knowledge! ]

he's at an age where he should consider marriage for the future of the sect. yes. he has many other good qualities too! he likes cleanliness, and he can swim very far, and he can shoot arrows well! his cooking is edible! he doesn't snore when he sleeps, but sometimes he kicks pretty hard.

he also has nice cheekbones. very manly. handsome cheekbones only.

text | un: qingqiu

[peerlesscucumber]

Such drunken ramblings posted for all to see... ah. You're very fond of your brother, one can see.

[ he feels a little bad for poor jc here, but only a little. ]

If you have such faith in him, allow him the time and grace to find his own companion to walk the path of life with, as one would be certain you'd prefer for yourself.

[ more or less he could see himself having thought about doing this in his first life for his elder, but not eldest, brother, but you know, never go through with it! and his "brothers" in this life are, well, involved with one Jiang Cheng, or his literal evil twin going through retirement rehabilitation.

#details ]

[resurging]

i'm only trying to get him to move past his personal shyness and get himself some attention! perhaps, somehow, through this he will find someone who will look to him as the moon looks upon the stars.

i wouldn't presume to force him to a match that he doesn't want to have! on my honor! i just want people to appreciate him!

Text; un: shiliu

[shiliu]

I can introduce him to a variety of very pretty ladies, who are delighted to provide conversation and companionship, all for a reasonable price.

[resurging]

ah? will it cost me a lot of money? wait, are they ladies of the night? is that proper???

text | j.valentine

[torsion]

Ha ha, I love this. :)
Yeah, sure. I'll hang out with the guy.
I also like soup and sparring.
And dogs, specifically.

[resurging]

ah! perfect! a match for my dearest brother!

jiang cheng also likes dogs a lot! i shall make haste and let him know!

what name should i give him, my lady? or sir?

(Text; UN: motherofdragons)

[decisiveconquest]

Did you receive his permission for this announcement? (She has met said brother and he doesn't seem the...type?)

[resurging]

i! have not, at all, gained his permission.

[and he is unashamed of this fact, oof.]