003✖; (audio @hot.damn)

[circumitus]

Important question: How do you tell if someone's your friend?

Is it something that people just... know or do they have a conversation about it?

[How does friendship work and more importantly, can you eat it?]

The whole concept of friendship always seemed strange, honestly. People just decide "Hey, this person isn't a complete piece of shit"? Weird. [Well, now she might just be projecting onto herself.

[So, wait. Does this mean that she has friends? Does anyone have friends? How annoying.]

Comments

text | username: inaban

[dereban]

[Oh, this is definitely an awkward conversation to have over the network. She doesn't mind answering this, but she'll default to text since it's easier to talk about this without showing her emotions too much over audio or video.]

For most people, I believe it's generally intrinsic?

It's all about feelings, mostly. "Do I like this person?" "Do they like me back?" "Are we having fun together?" "Do I trust them?" There's a long laundry list and I could go on and on, but the point is that, well... it's a 'bond', really.

Sure, some people do have a conversation about it. You can ask, if you do have positive feelings towards the above if they want to be friends with you and they can answer those feelings with some of their own.

But this isn't always the case. Sometimes you just end up hanging around people and eventually just... wind up becoming friends, without even asking that vital question.

[circumitus]

[To be fair, Rey is pretty emotionally constipated (obvious, given the subject matter of her question), so text works for her as well.]

so youre saying it changes on a case by case basis?

great never been any good picking up on that shit like a normal person

[In short SHE DOOMED but at least she's trying.]

voice; UN: Persephone

[ragingnature]

[ There was a moment where Persephone was sure she knew the answer to this and then she had to stop and think. And now she's not so sure. ]

Um, well, for me it's just kind of a feeling. You just kind of know...you know?

[ Basically she thinks of everyone that doesn't immediately give her bad vibes or tell her to go away as a friend. ]

But it never hurts to ask.

[circumitus]

[SEE? IT'S HARDER THAN IT SOUNDS.]

Well, no. Have never really just... known, with that shit.

Guess it'll be easier to ask. Just seems like a pain.

[She's not naïve, at least -- just very inexperienced with that kind of thing. Send help.]

audio | un: korra

[goestoextremes]

Sudden nice realization that I had never had a girlfriend to hang out with and talk to before.

[ ... That was one time!! But let's start with that.]

[circumitus]

Oh.

[it dawns on her]

Huh. Never really had that issue before. Guess it was all pretty... ah, even?

[resenting]

That's pretty much the grind of it, yeah.

If you're not sure, all yourself if somebody is sticking seeking even if you're being shitty to them. That usually means they care.

[circumitus]

[Yyyup, she can think of a few that fit that bill -- sticking around her even when she's being a shitty person. Wups.]

Always just assumed they were masochists.

Voice | TachibanaS

[triggerhappytraitor]

Something like that, yeah. Realizing that someone has repeatedly gone of of their way to help you and that you would do likewise for them.

It's a bit strange to actually think about it. Easier to just go with the gut feeling.

[circumitus]

Figured people who did that were usually being too nice for their own good.

[Like most of the people in this world, it seemed. Though to be fair, she's gotten the vibe that the Prismals are obligated to be hospitable to the Moonblessed now.]

text | un: 76

[mylawn]

You don't. There's always a chance someone is using you.

[circumitus]

well yeah no shit

can usually tell when someone is just trying to take advantage think thats the difference

text | j.valentine

[torsion]

I guess you just realize it.
Or, you don't ever really put a word to it but you know.
I'm sure some people talk about it or have particular criteria, but it's different for everyone.

Not too helpful, I know.

[circumitus]

still confusing but points to people for trying tho
thanks

Audio

[suspecteverything]

Generally, yeah. People just decide hey this guy isn't a complete piece of shit and you actually kind of like hanging around them. Usually they do something that shows they actually care about you in some way too.

Course you have to be able to read them well enough to determine whether they're being kind to you because they actually like you as a friend or whether they just want something from you. The unfortunate part is sometimes you can't tell until it's too late, and those betrayals are some of the most brutal.

[He pauses for a second as he realizes something important.]

Why the hell I'm sharing information about friendship I have no idea. I can count my friends on one hand, and those are all a recent acquisition. And we have an odd friendship. Seriously, you better off not listening to me about something like this. What the minsid hell was I thinking?

[circumitus]

Hey, now. Am still trying to figure out why the hell anyone would want friendship with someone who doesn't know dick about returning the favor or expressing... shit, any kind of affection that's expected of people here.

Willing to take any kind of answers at this point. Have always been able to tell when someone is trying to get close because they want something, but those who act like they don't want anything in return? Suspicious.

[The last person Rey suspected of eventual betrayal and using her she ended up decapitating before it could inevitably happen. Though she does question her own judgement at the time every now and then. Oh well, no take backsies now.]

[voice]

[letxequalnull]

It is a matter of connection.

[Not that. Xemnas really has anyone he could call a friend, but that's more to do with his lack of a heart to make connections with than anything else.]

[voice]

[circumitus]

Hmm, have a feeling you're not talking about the dial-up or wireless kind.

[Har dee har, Rey.]

text | un: springtime

[hopticulture]

I'm sure you COULD have a conversation about it but most of the time it kind of just happens. If you enjoy someone's company and want to spend time with them and get to know them, that's kind of just how friendships start.

[circumitus]

they start sure

been trying to figure out where the acquaintance status ends and the friendship part of it is supposed to begin

audio | un: blekksprut

[fuckinghysterical]

[While LB usually defaulted to text, because of her particular quirk, she figured she had run into Rey enough to know that she wasn't particularly bothered by that aspect of hers.]

Honestly? Ahaha... I guess I don't really know myself. But I guess if you enjoy their company, that's... enough for me. I don't think there's really an easy way to know if someone feels the same way.

[circumitus]

[It's good, LB. Rey's used to that kind of stuff by now -- and it's not like she's without a few quirks, herself.]

Makes sense. Would be easier if there was a lightning bulb moment for it, though.

un: kei5

[loudmouths]

are you serious

[circumitus]

[yyyy]

yes?

voice; un: f

[doggish]

Once they begin to do you favors, and you them, without any thought of repayment, save to make their lives easier or them happier.

[That's Fenris' definition, anyway. Also: hello, what's up, lady he adventured with that one time. Nice to understand each other, isn't it?]

[circumitus]

[SURE IS. She can hear him speaking the same language she is but she very much recognizes that voice.]

Seems to be the general consensus around here.

Been here long enough, you'd think this shit would be obvious, but no.

[voice] un: ladyofthewind

[sheisthewind]

A friend is someone who you regularly spend time around without anything to gain from it other than their company.

[circumitus]

Hn. Could never tell if they do that out of boredom or obligation or something else...

[Not everyone is as self-flagellating as you, Rey.]

text; un: anonymous

[zunge]

I've wondered this same shit for ages.

Someone who's even more distrustful of others than I am gave me some advice. It boils down to the little details. Some may have the patience or drive to play a long game of deception, but many don't. Instead, look at their priorities. How concerned they are for your well-being without looking for anything in return. Giving without seeking more than basic company. How far they'll go to make sure you're okay. Listening to you, even putting your comfort and well-being before their own. Basic body language.

[circumitus]

[That's...]

useful

body language is easy enough but the rest helps thanks