006 » TEXT; un: Anonymous

[ragingnature]

[ She's been sitting on this for a little bit now, unsure how to proceed. Luckily there's this handy dandy thing called the internet that she can ask. Anonymously, no less. Granted she'll probably out herself fairly quickly. ]

Those of you in committed relationships here how do you go about things?

What I mean is the Moons and various happenings in this world have a tendency to cause complications. So how do you deal with those things? What kind of arrangement have you come to?

Comments

text | j.valentine

[torsion]

I'm pretty new to being in a relationship, but we agreed to be monogamous.

You deal with it as it comes. I guess it might be easier for me being someone that enjoys fighting and falls under Sanguis moon, but it's not much of an issue for me.
If things changed for some reason, I'd just talk to him.
The real arrangement we have, I guess, is honesty.

[ragingnature]

I see. I'm not in a relationship but the possibility has presented itself and I suppose I want a plan for how I'm going to approach things first.

Being honest makes sense.

text; un: 🌹

[hotproblems]

Personally, I have never experienced a moon cycle so egregious that complications might arise, but I understand that may be simple luck. Still, I am another who has chosen monogamy.

[...]

Realistically, I imagine the question to ask is how much leniency you are willing to give each other.

[ragingnature]

It's not just the moon cycles that might cause problems. This world is strange and sometimes things happen outside of the cyles.

I suppose so.

text: un; catpurrcino

[chainlinks]

[Time to be a protagonist and help anon with their trouble best he can.]

I am lucky so far that those I am with are alright with 'complications' happening. It is a delicate balance, since you need everyone to know you love them equally, but I find it's worth it.

[ragingnature]

So you have multiple partners?

[ She still can't wrap her head around that. Then again, she hasn't even had a relationship to begin with. ]

text | un: demonchef

[satanslash]

talked about it, came to agreements that if a friend really needs help during a moon or if something just happens we wouldnt hold it against the other person

honestly though we're so focused on each other it hasnt been a problem yet

[ragingnature]

That makes sense.

It must be nice to have someone you love that much.

un: f.b.

[amant]

What do you mean by complications?

What I mean is, is it a matter of Moonlacing too frequently and lacking proper sleep? Or, is it the very high likelihood of you finding multiple people outside of your 'committed' relationship attractive and not knowing what to do?

[ Valid questions from the gross French dude here. ]

[ragingnature]

Well, you know how things happen outside of the moon cycle that can cause similar effects? That's what I mean.

text | anonymous

[hopticulture]

My boyfriend is the kind of guy who gets really weird if he realizes I've been hanging out with another male, so we haven't really talked about any sort of arrangement while we've been here...

I've just been doing my best to avoid complications, which I know isn't the best advice or the kind of answer you're probably looking for.

[ragingnature]

Oh. [ That seems concerning to her. ]

That was easier when I didn't have a roommate.

anonymous text, un: ANON

[doreimi]

You know...this is actually something I've been thinking about more and more, lately. One of my friends got me thinking about it, actually. Because — it feels like, on some level, it's natural to want to kind of impose the same rules we were taught back home onto the way we act here, but in other ways it's completely different, isn't it? And it makes me wonder...are we doing things that way because that's actually what's best, or just because it's what we were taught and there was never any reason to question it?

That's sort of a complicated non-answer, I know, but...I mean, a big part of getting into a relationship is supposed to be finding someone to settle down and start a family with, right? And that's not really a thing here at all, for a lot of reasons. So...it's something to think about, I guess.

[ragingnature]

Oh no, that's fine! It's been on my mind for a little bit now. I've never been in a romantic relationship but everything I've been taught before arriving here is that it's just two people who love each other very much. The whole idea that such relationships could include multiple people had never crossed my mind. But this world has proven that whole notion to be a bit an oddity. So I've been curious about what others think and how they're going about things.

Exactly. Back home, if the option was available to me, I would be looking to get married and start a family and that would be that. But this isn't home.

Text; un: theironbull

[nehraachargers]

We're up front and honest. Both of us know where the other has been and we don't keep secrets from each other. Plus, both of us do better in an open relationship but I know that's not for everyone.

But the key to having a committed relationship, even in a place like this, is being honest with each other. If either of you is going to be uncomfortable about something it's going to mess things up.

Because I take it you're thinking about starting one up so I figured I'd give advice form that angle.

[ragingnature]

[ Oh, look, one person she could have spoken to in person but opted to go anonymous and get more opinions instead. ]

I know a lot of people in open relationships but no one's really explained that that means.

Being honest seems to be the common consensus and makes the most sense. Which is naturally how I'd go about things but I was curious if anyone had specific rules or anything. I suppose I could have worded my post better to start.

[goestoextremes]

One more to the being honest about everything and not having any secrets between us line. We've agreed to be like whatever happens during moons or any other time here happens and it's fine, those things don't come between us. There are no (serious) feelings involved if things happen with others and we'll always come back home to each other.

[ragingnature]

You make it sound so easy.

failed anonymous | un: konoha

[lumberlady]

[thinking she didn't fuck up her anonymous function... Konoha decides not to practice her reading and writing and uses the voice-to-text feature in an effort to avoid outing herself]

It can be a little difficult if your partner is the jealous type, or if you are... I know I felt really weird about not being faithful the first time, and then again the first time it happened to me...

But you have to talk about it really clearly with each other, I think, and decide how you want to do it. And I think you should talk to each other sooner rather than later, if you can... My partner and I decided that we would confess to each other any time something happens, and then, um. Have sex with each other. To sort of... reclaim. Each other.

Something like that? It's working really well for me, so I hope you find something that works for you, Miss Anonymous.

[Mister Anonymous???]

[ragingnature]

[ Oh no, Konoha! She feels a little bad about the anon fail and wonders if she should switch to a private conversation and out herself.


That might be more embarrassing... ]

Jealousy is certainly something I'm worried about.

Oh... That's certainly a way to go about things I suppose. [ Maybe more than she needed to know. ]

Thank you for sharing how you've been doing things since arriving here.

text; un: anonymous

[getting_better]

I've thought about it a few times and under normal circumstances, I'd probably incredibly pissed and do something drastic. But given this place, I'm sure things might end up out of control not that it makes things any better. It scares me a lot actually, but I can take a guess that the right thing to do is to talk about it.

[ragingnature]

I take it you don't yet have a partner then?

Text un: redkey

[princessascended]

Hoo boy. I got into a committed relationship with two other people when I arrived here, and two of us were Iris, so I know this feeling.

What we did was, as soon as we figured out how we felt about each other, we sat down around a table and we started talking our way through it. Which was awkward as all get out, since we'd basically just confessed and now we had to talk about what happened if one or two of us went into heat and literally couldn't control ourselves.

We agreed that it would be silly to hold those sort of things against each other, but also that we needed to be up front about them so nobody got the wrong idea. I've, uh... had to share a few embarrassing stories.

[ragingnature]

Talking about it everytime something happens with someone else certainly does sound a little embarrassing.

[ She's not sure if she wants to go that route. ]

text | anonymous

[liveandforgive]

The person I'm with has another partner. Kinda hard to have a right to be jealous when the cycles drive me nuts too. But what we've got is different from just Moonlacing.

I trust her enough to believe in that.

[ragingnature]

But you don't have another partner?

Text - UN: pumpaction

[angelshot]

how do you deal with it?
uhhhh
you dont date in the first place. lol.

[ragingnature]

Okay, but what if I want to?

un: everapple

[greenbriar]

[ ...did he accidentally ❤️ the post while stalking all these answers? it's possible. ]